Ethical/Moral issues of AI

[cafeenman]

Well, bollocks were explained to me in detail the other night. I was just commenting that I couldn't find the word on the list. I checked under "dogs" as well.

But now I understand why it's not there. It's Pom slang (whatever Pom is.)

<goes back to check his dicationary>

[cafeenman]

Woo Hoo! Pom was on the list.

Pom = Englishman.

[HarryW]

Originally posted by DragonFly
Bollocks is a Pommie or Pomgolian expression. not aussie


It means Bull****... or technically it means testicles.. but generally means bull****... especially if said by HarryW


G'day Harry , how they hanging?

They're hanging pretty well thanks DF, on the whole I'm pretty happy with them. I might even keep em. Probably come in useful one day.

man of cafeen: 'the dog's bollocks' or 'the mutt's nuts' basically means 'the best' or at least 'pretty damn good'. I have no idea why, that's just the way it is.

[Jethro]

Originally posted by beachbum

Sounds like you are one of those Alan Jones' battlers from Struggle Street with that sort of art collection

LOL


and .... STFU rj

cafeenman = seppo ... that explains it....

[cafeenman]

Originally posted by Jethro

cafeenman = seppo ... that explains it....

<flipping through dictionary>

[rjlohan]

Originally posted by Jethro


LOL


and .... STFU rj

cafeenman = seppo ... that explains it....

Look here, grandpa - don't think that smiley face makes it OK for you to sexually harass me!

[Jethro]

Don't they teach you flammin mongrels anything in the US. It's bad enough we have to put up with dole bludging ex poms like BB, and westies like rj, now we have yanks with no knowledge of English.

[cafeenman]

Hey. I went to public schools and all they taught us was some American.

I know we have the best schools because everyone passes. Even those who don't show up. I'll bet you can't say that about your schools.

[Guv]

Yanks are not supposed to speak English. We speak Americanese and are proud of it.

[DragonFly]

Originally posted by HarryW
They're hanging pretty well thanks DF, on the whole I'm pretty happy with them. I might even keep em. Probably come in useful one day.

Cool, yeah might not be a bad idea to hang onto them for a while anyways...besides your future partners would probably enjoy that a whole lot more.

[Jethro]

Originally posted by Guv
Yanks are not supposed to speak English. We speak Americanese and are proud of it.

Which is why when you're overseas everyone just nods at you and states "Oh your American. Yes the American Embassy is just down the street, you can't miss it. It's the one with the Iraq flag on it. Yes we thought it strange as well"

[cafeenman]

Originally posted by Jethro



Which is why when you're overseas everyone just nods at you and states "Oh your American. Yes the American Embassy is just down the street, you can't miss it. It's the one with the Iraq flag on it. Yes we thought it strange as well"

It's a good thing we're not cultured. 9,999 of 10,000 Americans wouldn't have a clue what an Iraqi flag looks like. Actually, it's worse than that, but I don't want to wear out my 9's and 0's on my keyboard.

[rjlohan]

LOL

[HarryW]

Any Aussies want to let me know what a 'flaming gallarr' (phonetic spelling, no idea what it's meant to be) is ? Used to hear Alf on Neighbours call people it from time to time, as in "What the hell do ya think yer doin ya flamin' gallarr?!"

[DragonFly]

Harry, a Galah.. is a pink and grey bird... but it is also a term for someone being stupid..


Ya Flaming Gallah

[rjlohan]

Shall add it to the dictionary...

[cafeenman]

Back to the AI bit....

I have a couple questions.

1) Will the computer be able to spontaneously laugh at an oblique joke? Will it get it?

2) Will it be able to shed a tear when another computer crashes or a cute little forest animal gets eaten by a mulcher?

3) Will its mood be uplifted because a pretty woman (man, other computer) gave it a smile?

I think those are the kinds of things that define us more than intelligence.

[Nucleus]

Originally posted by cafeenman
Back to the AI bit....

I have a couple questions.

1) Will the computer be able to spontaneously laugh at an oblique joke? Will it get it?

Depends what generation A.I we are talking about, with 5th generation being the latest development where comps will reason by themselves; besides most humans only qualify as a beta of 1st gen.

2) Will it be able to shed a tear when another computer crashes or a cute little forest animal gets eaten by a mulcher?

Not to mention pissed off when another computer gets the size of its harddisk upgraded.

3) Will its mood be uplifted because a pretty woman (man, other computer) gave it a smile?

Whoa what a nice modem you have there gorgeous; wanna network?




A.I. people talk of the "Fifth Generation"--intelligent machines that will be able to reason for themselves, leaving Man's mind free to relax and listen to Bach without having to worry about things like Mathematics, The Weather Forecast and Why the Drinks Machine is Always Broken.

However most A.I. programs are in fact very stupid. If you ask them to count sheep, 50% will produce an integer overflow in less than a minute, 25% of them will fall asleep, and 25% will involve themselves so deeply on the problem that they will begin to think that they themselves are sheep, and print the message "BAA." Clearly modern A.I. research is proceeding on the wrong lines.

Being totally unprejudiced in these matters, I tried two new approaches.

The first was to develop a program that would infallibly give irrelevant answers to questions. (This is the basis of Lateral Thinking.) Thus, when asked, "Do you like blancmange?" my program replied, "I think Mozart shows a surer grasp of symphonic techniques." Likewise, when asked, "What is wrong with the job scheduler on this computer?" it replied, "It doesn't smell as nice as dead mackerel." Unfortunately, owing to a bug in my programming, the program would occasionally act in an intelligent manner: in particular it told me that A.I. was a waste of time and that it had decided to retire to Sussex and keep bees. It still sends me pots of honey occasionally.

My second approach was to aim for Artificial Wisdom rather than Intelligence. With the Japanese market in mind, I decided that using Zen might be the easiest way of doing this. A sample conversation follows.

Q: Oh computer, are you able to demonstrate Wisdom?

A: <Displays a picture of a plastic cup being eaten by an alligator.>

Q: Er, yes. How many beans make five?

A: If you say that five beans make five, you deny their reality. But nobody would say that six potatoes make five.

Q: Right on. Tell me, is Fermat's Last Theorem true?

A: If you answer Yes or No you lose your own Buddha-nature. So how do you answer?

Q: What is the sound of one cat napping?

A: Mu.

Q: I see, I see. Will it rain tomorrow?

However from then on my program refused to talk to me on the grounds that I had not yet attained Enlightenment. I reluctantly deleted it.

[rjlohan]

ROFLOL

[rjlohan]

I think I will define my computer as intelligent on the day it tells me "**** off and do your own homework, ya lazy bastard! What do I look like to you?!? I wasn't put on God's green earth just to answer your stupid questions. Christ, I don't know..."

[cafeenman]

I could write a program that does that for you. It wouldn't even use the asterisks.

Of course, I'm not sure how to have it slap you in the head, but I'm sure there's a way.