Incorrect Programming...Developers Please Read.

[Wokawidget]

If you were working on a project from scratch and the users asked for something in a certain way, which was absolutely stupid and would make programming it an absolute nightmre, what would you do?
Would you tell them are being silly and show them a better wya of doing it.
What would you do if they INSISTED on what they have asked for, but it will cause X many problems trying to write it and make your app almost impossible to easily maintain it???


Any tips?

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

[mendhak]

(IF THE USER IS STUPID) First, I'd make stuff up as to how it's not possible to do that within the stipulated time frame. (REMEMBER: big words! big words!) I'd also say how it could be potentially harmful for the existing secondary RAM partition.

Otherwise,
first I'd tell the user, look, buddy, no can do. It'll cause so and so problems.

If he still doesn't agree, I'd do it my way, yet make it LOOK like I've done it his way. This is called Concealment of Stupid User Criteria through Transparency.

If that weren't possible, I'D DO IT HIS WAY!!!!

[Swatty]

You can tell how it could be done much easier.
If they insist, tell them it would take 10 times so long to write it and it would still do the same thing in the end.
If they still insist , charge them enough they have to come to sense. If they don't , and you can't get under it , ......



Code it they asked.

[Hack]

Write it your way, and show it to them.

I've done that a zillion times, and at least a million of those zillion the user has accepted it.

[mendhak]

Originally posted by Hack
Write it your way, and show it to them.

I've done that a zillion times, and at least a million of those zillion the user has accepted it.

Isn't a million out of a zillion a really really small percentage???

[JPicasso]

Definatly suggest alternate ways if what they want is going to
to be a pain.

Secondly, don't tell them "no" just remind them that all it's gonna
take to do exactly what they want is time and money.

Also, it's poor form to refer to users as users.
The users are who will say "wonkawidget, he sure fixed us up good."
or they will say, "wonkawidget couldn't program his way out of a wet paper
sack with a chainsaw... and when he was done, we couldn't even USE the program."

If the users are asking for changes, but are not signing the checks,
and what they want is going to take toomuch time and money,
just blame management.

[Wokawidget]

Project is almost at completion phase and the spec isn't very details to say the least!
The way forms have been designed and set up and the way the logic works in the background, what the can and can't do, which I've just been told about, makes it a nightmare to code.

[darre1]

explain how much more man-hours it will take to create and thus you will be left with no choice but to charge them more than if you were to do it your way.

that usually revives a few grey cells.

[Wokawidget]

I have told my boss on a number of occasions. Even re-written part of the app to how it shud be done, but by boss has said NO! They want it the way theyve asked for, but I can guarrentee that noone has said, by the way, if we do it like this...blah blah blah. It's not even contract work. It's only inhouse stuff for another department
To top it off, my typing is crap today and I have a headache from getting pissed off!!! In my last place my boss took my word for things if I said they couldn't be done or it wud make it hard, but at my new place they arn't having any of it.
I am no longer a VB Developer, I am just a VDU operator who does data input !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Wokawidget]

I have a deadline which I have to meet, so due to others f*****g up I am going to have to do overtime, which I don't get paid for!!!

Sorry, I am having a good old whinge here

[Wokawidget]

One of the problems is that I have to use an MDI form, when the project is basically not designed to use one! This is causing all sorts of problems. I can't lock things modaly and therefore have to do nasty ****ty coding to work round this!!!
Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

*sigh*

Sorry.

[JPicasso]

sounds like you gonna have to do what they want.

better start your list of reasons this app didn't come in on time.

1. Changed spec at last minute.
2. Spec change severly impacted written code.
3. Not many boxes (insert favorite morning food) came my way.
4. Planet alignment put extra glare on my screen.
5. Dammit Jim, I"m a programmer, not a Freakin magician.

[darre1]

yeh, but i reckon your boss is just jealous of your nice new cozy cottage

[Cander]

TRy programming for the Air Force. I am constantly bombarded by really stupid and/or unrealistic request from Colnels. And you cant tell them to go bite me! Ive got one program that is the worst sphaghetti code you have ever seen because of this crap, and just received an order for another program they want done in 1 month that should take at least 5 months...becuase the colnel said so..

[JPicasso]

Originally posted by Wokawidget
One of the problems is that I have to use an MDI form, when the project is basically not designed to use one! This is causing all sorts of problems. I can't lock things modaly and therefore have to do nasty ****ty coding to work round this!!!
Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

*sigh*

Sorry.

Whoa, you mean the users are telling you how to program, as in
use a modal form?
I thought you were getting things like "We need a screen that keeps track
of what we had to eat today, and tie it into email."

man, that's a bad week.

[mendhak]

Woka, relieve yourself of that frustration by screaming here. Don't type AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.....
instead type the same in bold and make the size really large. It's very relaxing, I tell ya.

becuase the colnel said so..

LMFAO....

[mendhak]

I didn't read that.... This means woka's got INTELLIGENT users!! Oh my god! I sympathise with you, woka. I really do. If only you knew the joy of having to work for users who didn't have a clue as to what was going on..... If only.

[Cander]

Intellegent users? Man that would be a luxury.

[RSINGH]

If he still doesn't agree, I'd do it my way, yet make it LOOK like I've done it his way. This is called Concealment of Stupid User Criteria through Transparency.

Totally agree - and then charge them anyway for being such a pain in the arse. I've got a fair few apps that are now a pile o 5hite to maintain due to users being completely unreasonable nobbers.

[darre1]

but surely the customer is always right?


I just fancy getting flamed

[mendhak]

Originally posted by Cander
Intellegent users? Man that would be a luxury.

Intelligent users: bollocks
Dumb users: dog bollocks

(assuming I have learnt the correct british terminology regarding genitalia)

Why do you call it a luxury, I can't imagine.

[RSINGH]

Originally posted by darre1
but surely the customer is always right?


I just fancy getting flamed

Not when they're in-house or management

[mendhak]

Originally posted by darre1
but surely the customer is always right?


I just fancy getting flamed

Pure marketing strategy. So that the "user" is satisfied his or her "needs" are being met, yet the companies can still shove french fries up their a$$.

[RSINGH]

Intelligent users are those that just nod their head and agree with everything you say while maintaining a blank look of incomprehension about them. The downside is the project must not fail as they can quite justifiably blame you. You better be damn good when following this approach.

[mendhak]

Originally posted by RSINGH
Intelligent users are those that just nod their head and agree with everything you say while maintaining a blank look of incomprehension about them. The downside is the project must not fail as they can quite justifiably blame you. You better be damn good when following this approach.

I see! What I call "stoned users" are called "intelligent users" in the UK! That's just dog bollocks!!

[Abdulrahman]

theres a say...

"customers always right"..

however...

- customer only approched you becase you know better than them in what ever they approched you for..

OR

- they know as well.. but they are buying your time in order to do the task for them.


SO... what you do is MAKE SURE that they know exactly what their asking for.. and that they know what the outcomes may be should you do it "their way"..

IF the customer knows and understands all this... then... go ahead and do it the way they want.

Your part is to advise on issues you think should be done better..but.. after you explain that to them, it is up to the customer to decide you what to do.

So.. Your line finishes here. thats bascily it


Abe

[darre1]

so to sum it up, "The customer is always right, providing you make sure they there are aware of just how right they actually are."

[Wokawidget]

These are not itelligent users.
I think a past programmer has told them what they can have, which was wrong, and they stuck to that. I don't have any interaction with them, which is really annoying as I can't discuss things with them. I have to go via 2-3 people which is why it's so annoying.
I am dealing with other programmers who load everythhing from the database into class modules and forms when the app starts, which takes 5 minutes. Then when they click on a menu it just shows the form as it's already in memory. When they click close, it just hides the form. If another user updates a record in the database noone else will see the effect unless they close down the entire app and reload it!!! I have just pointed this out and he said "Oh didn't think of that!". For fcuks sake!!! He did it that way coz it took about 1.5 seconds to load each form when a user wanted to see it. *sigh*

[SIZE = 200] ARGGGHH![/SIZE]

[darre1]

1 Wokka cottage,
Wokka Street
Wokkaville
North Wokka.

Dear Wokka,


I mean no disrespect but why do you have a teddy-bear as your avatar, its a bit gay.


Yours Respectfully,


Darrel

[Wokawidget]

It's not a teddy bear. It's a badger!
Badgers are comical, espescially when you see them attempt to role a joint

[Wokawidget]

Right...5pm! Time to go home and do what my badger can't

[darre1]

teehee

i like cheering people up