Tributes to the Queen Mum

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 04:51 AM

Well somebody had to ...

The Queen Mum

The Board of Remembrance

"I think that the Queen Mum and Princess Diana
are our very own Twin
Trade Towers. At last we can look the people of New
York in the face". L. Ward,Mansfield.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"When Diana died I swore I would never smile
again, but eventually I did. Now the Queen Mum has gone
I cannot image that I will ever smile for
the rest of my life, but I will probably break that
one too". A. Christie, Hendon.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She was one of the old school, all the
remaining royals are ****"
J. Clement. Grantham.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"I thought she would never die, she has let us
all down very badly" D. Holmes, Somerset.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She was a trooper and she never gave up. I
remember one time she was visiting a school and I asked
her if she would like to make a visit to the cloakroom
before she left. 'No' she replied, 'I didn't give in to
the Nazis and I won't give in to the bladder'. That's
how she was, a fighter, who refused to be beaten by
anything. She pissed herself later though,it was
sickening". B. Forrester, North Yorkshire.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She was a marvelous woman, and a wonderful
lover". L. J. Worthington, Penrith.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"I am absolutely devastated, at least we could
have got the day
off". S. Wilson, Bristol.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"How refreshing to be able to mourn the death of
a member of the Royal family without being accused of
being homosexual". J. Fletcher, High Wycombe.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"Her death should act as a warning to others who
think it is cool to experiment with drugs". E. Franks,
Cheshire.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"On behalf on all blacks, I send the sincerest
condolences". T. Watson, Ilford.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"Perhaps if we automated her old golf buggy it
could still drive around The Mall on its own and bring
pleasure to the tourists". Y. Howell, Slough.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"Once again the Queen is not upset enough for my
liking, the woman should have a bit more compassion, how
would she feel if it was her mother?" W.Waugh, Richmond.

--------------------------------------------------------

"It is such a loss, God has shat on our heads".
K. O'Neil, Inverness.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"I am sure the Queen Mum will not let this
setback put an end to her public duties". N. Wallace,
Swansea.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"I hold Princess Margaret in no small way
responsible for this terrible event" E. Thompson, West
Lothian.

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"Bomb Iraq for us Tony, its the only thing that
will make us feel better" P. McGregor, Southampton.

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"We must do all we can, send blankets, food
parcels, jumpers, anything to help these brave souls who
are queuing up to walk past her coffin".
R. Thompson, Bath.

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"I have been unable to masturbate for five days,
and will not do so again until her majesty is buried" E.
Gorman, Derbyshire.

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".
R. Combes,Romford.

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"No matter how she felt, no matter the situation, she
always wore a smile.Just like a retard"
G. Hollins, East Sussex.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"I remember she came to visit us in the East End
one time. She was so kind, so generous and so sweet. She
whispered softly in my ear,'you know its not true' she
said, 'you don't smell of ****'. She was a wondrous
person". E. Collier, London.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"Whichever way you look at it, it just is not as
exciting as Diana". G. Williams, West Midlands.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She was one of us, and by that I don't mean she
perpetrated insurance fraud or lied about expense
claims. She was like us in a good way.
God bless you ma'am". L. Weller, Harlow.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"If only I could get my hands on that fish bone
right now, you heartless bastard!"
J. Hedges, Cowdenbeath.

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She had such a difficult life, always battling
against adversity and misfortune. Let us hope that if
there is a next time round she
is given a life of privilege and comfort"
T.D.Wainwright,
Hastings.

--------------------------------------------------------

If there are any futher developments in the
Queen Mother's condition we will keep you informed.

**Ianpbaker** · Apr 12th, 2002, 04:56 AM

Originally posted by RSINGH
[B]Well somebody had to ...

--------------------------------------------------------
-
"Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".
R. Combes,Romford.

--------------------------------------------------------

We can but hope

**HarryW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:00 AM

Nice one Ranj =)

**Ianpbaker** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:02 AM

Originally posted by RSINGH

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"She had such a difficult life, always battling
against adversity and misfortune. Let us hope that if
there is a next time round she
is given a life of privilege and comfort"
T.D.Wainwright,
Hastings.

--------------------------------------------------------

Typical bloody Hastinger

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:05 AM

Damn, was just about to post the same thread

very very funny

However, more insulting than the the piece I posted from the Guardian 2 days ago Ranj...can I assume your comments on my thread:

"I watched the funeral last night and thought it was quite good. The Guardian is written by a load of left wing ******s. "

and

"Lets not forget jealous, self serving and whatever the word for thinking they know better is."

are now redundant?

**Guru** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:08 AM

Originally posted by RSINGH

--------------------------------------------------------
--
"Her death should act as a warning to others who
think it is cool to experiment with drugs". E. Franks,
Cheshire.

--------------------------------------------------------

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:10 AM

I stand by all my comments about those lefty commie bar stewards at the Guardian. However I'nm nowhere near as anal about things like certain turtley members.

Anyway, I'm over it unlike some.

Originally posted by Filburt1
"I have been unable to masturbate for five days,
and will not do so again until her majesty is buried"
Filburt1 - USA

**Ianpbaker** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:12 AM

ROTFLMFAO

**Wally Pipp** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:14 AM

"I formally wish to complain about the terms of endearment that people use. Queen mum. Disgusting that is. She is not our mum, she was the Queen's mother and should be referred to that way !
She was high above us but still a very loveable person. She will be sadly missed " - T.Barkins, Leicester.

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:17 AM

/storms out through the mist of hippocracy....

**plenderj** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:40 AM

Originally posted by RSINGH
I stand by all my comments about those lefty commie bar stewards at the Guardian. However I'nm nowhere near as anal about things like certain turtley members.

Anyway, I'm over it unlike some.

Ya know, if I posted that I'd have flubber complaining about me again

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:41 AM

Originally posted by plenderj

Ya know, if I posted that I'd have flubber complaining about me again

Anyone would think I was deliberately baiting him...

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 05:59 AM

Ranj, I will not tolerate your flaming any more. FudgeBucket is as free an individual as anybody else on these forums, has been here a full two years longer than you, and has helped many people and has earned his place here.

I have tried to reason with you and asked you to refrain from flaming him, or at the very least limit it to the private domain. I don't particularly care what you think of his sexual orientation (which is screaming bender anyway), what your opinion of his site is, or what your opinion of him is. In fact, I’ve got no cause for complaint and no reason to keep going running to mummy, actually.

Sorry. Carry on.

**plenderj** · Apr 12th, 2002, 06:08 AM

Hohoho the fur (or rather shell) will be flying soon

http://www.vbforums.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=927492

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 06:12 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
Ranj, I will not tolerate your flaming any more. FudgeBucket is as free an individual as anybody else on these forums, has been here a full two years longer than you, and has helped many people and has earned his place here.

I have tried to reason with you and asked you to refrain from flaming him, or at the very least limit it to the private domain. I don't particularly care what you think of his sexual orientation (which is screaming bender anyway), what your opinion of his site is, or what your opinion of him is. In fact, I’ve got no cause for complaint and no reason to keep going running to mummy, actually.

Sorry. Carry on.

*Wipes tears from eyes and tries to explain to colleagues what is so funny

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 06:13 AM

Oh I forgot.

Spa

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 07:46 AM

Originally posted by RSINGH
I stand by all my comments about those lefty commie bar stewards at the Guardian. However I'nm nowhere near as anal about things like certain turtley members.

Anyway, I'm over it unlike some.

Never said you were anal, just veering on the side of hippocracy - just to radically go back to the topic in hand (vbforums and turtletips should get a BIG boxing ring and collectively batter the **** out of each other...)

Feeling slight narked about being lambasted for the Guardian thread in the light of this thread IMO...

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 07:52 AM

To be fair, Ranj didn't complain about the thread; he just disagreed with the article (and laid into the Guardian).

I grumbled about the article, but I shouldn't really have done because there was nothing much wrong in it. It was in the light of other Guardian articles & letters on the topic that I got miffed.

Sorry, Gaff.

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 07:53 AM

Originally posted by Gaffer

Feeling slight narked about being lambasted for the Guardian thread in the light of this thread IMO...

Mate, I wasn't having a go at you, its the Guardian that I do not like. I really believe that they look down upon anybody that does not share their opinion on whatever subject. I did not want to offend you, I was just giving my opinion as regards to the paper and those that write for it.

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 07:54 AM

Oh yeah - sorry - I'll get you a pint or six

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:01 AM

Hairy muff... I've been reading it for for the last 12 years, and have always found their opinions refreshing and different.
I have never felt like I've been patronised into believing something. A paper is a source of information and opinion, not an instruction manual for living.

Horses for courses I guess...

Anyways, I'm late for my "Campaign for the Ramps for One Legged Black Lesbians in Soutwark" meeting...

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:05 AM

*Smoothes Gaffer's ruffled feathers*

I'd offer to help, but I'm tied up with the far more worthy "Campaign for the Ramps for One Legged, One Eyed Black Lesbian Single Mothers in Southwark".

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:07 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
*Smoothes Gaffer's ruffled feathers*

I'd offer to help, but I'm tied up with the far more worthy "Campaign for the Ramps for One Legged, One Eyed Black Lesbian Single Mothers in Southwark".

I'd ofer some help but I'm going clubbing - seal clubbing.

**GlenW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:08 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
"Campaign for the Ramps for One Legged, One Eyed, Black, Lesbian, Scottish, Bald, Smelly, Deaf, Single Mothers in Southwark".

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:10 AM

Shame you're so far from Southwark, Glen; it looks like you won't benefit.

**Wally Pipp** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:11 AM

Looks like a self-help group there dunc.
I take it you're the president ?

**GlenW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:12 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
Shame you're so far from Southwark, Glen; it looks like you won't benefit.

Listen pal, don't you ever accuse me of being scottish!

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:13 AM

/Fears there may be trouble ahead....

Glen, your a Jock anyway, coming from Newcastle

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:14 AM

Originally posted by Gaffer
your

Sorry Duncan

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:15 AM

Originally posted by Wally Pipp
Looks like a self-help group there dunc.
I take it you're the president ?

I was disqualified when they discovered I'm married.

**Wally Pipp** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:16 AM

bummer

**HarryW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:16 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
I was disqualified when they discovered I'm married.

Don't worry, I'm sure there are plenty of self-help groups for that too

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:17 AM

Originally posted by Gaffer
Sorry Duncan

Do it again and you get a trouting.

**GlenW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:17 AM

Originally posted by Gaffer
/Fears there may be trouble ahead....

Glen, your a Jock anyway, coming from Newcastle

What have I done to be so vilely insulted?
At least you didn't say welsh.

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:18 AM

Originally posted by HarryW
Don't worry, I'm sure there are plenty of self-help groups for that too

Good thing about being married is that you no longer have to settle for self-help.

**Gaffer** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:19 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
Do it again and you get a trouting.

The porpoise being...?

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:20 AM

Originally posted by GlenW
What have I done to be so vilely insulted?
At least you didn't say welsh.

He could have been really evil and accused you of being English.

**InvisibleDuncan** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:21 AM

Originally posted by Gaffer
The porpoise being...?

Any more of that and I might just poisson your drinks on Tuesday.

**RSINGH** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:22 AM

What have I done to be so vilely insulted?
At least you didn't say welsh.

*Hides before psycho rhino girl turns up

**GlenW** · Apr 12th, 2002, 08:22 AM

Originally posted by InvisibleDuncan
He could have been really evil and accused you of being English.

At least no-one has been accused of being french.
That would just be too far beyond the pale.

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