I saw a code snippet on www.vbworld.com regarding checking to see if the computer's got an active connection to the internet...unfortunatly, the search function is broken so I can't point you right to it. But it's there!
Things I've Said:
"Life's funny like that...elephants can wear frilly lace panties, and Dubya still looks like a monkey in a big chair"
"Take four goats and strap one to each foot of a llama. Presto, goat-powered llama!"
"You want to get me to work more, get me a Coke. No? Then deal with inferior garbage, I'm not coding another line and your clients can go to......thanks, I'd love a Coke right about now!"
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