What's green and smells of bacon?

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 05:42 AM

Kermit the frogs finger

denniswrenn · May 31st, 2001, 05:45 AM

I was so sure the answer was "Gary"

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 05:49 AM

Ahh You also visit www.SmellsLikeBacon.com

**Bonker Gudd** · May 31st, 2001, 05:50 AM

I was going to say Green Bacon

denniswrenn · May 31st, 2001, 05:50 AM

Of course

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 05:55 AM

I'm bored, hungry and can't be arsed in general

denniswrenn · May 31st, 2001, 05:57 AM

Well, just eat some bacon... I'm sure kermit can spare some

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 06:00 AM

I think a belly buster is in order

denniswrenn · May 31st, 2001, 06:01 AM

Eh?

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 06:02 AM

A buttered muffin that is the size of a dinner plate filled with bacon, egg, sausage, beans, black pudding and mushrooms.

Bring on the grease!

**Arbiter** · May 31st, 2001, 07:26 AM

Ahhhh..... we meet again Mr Lowe!

I see you're eating as healthily as ever...

Was chatting to your brother not so long back. It seems your whole family has worked at British Gas at one point or another!

**Gary.Lowe** · May 31st, 2001, 07:39 AM

Everyone but my mum

How's the old Secondary Processing going?

Who's dealing with the COT monster?

**Arbiter** · May 31st, 2001, 07:49 AM

SP is now restyled MBS (Manchester Business Solutions)

The only 'developer' we have left is Paul Abbott. Stargate is now a huge lumbering creature intent on crushing everything in its path.

How's things going for you?

PS - I think you should download the game I'm working on with a friend. Check out the Games and Graphics programming forum and look at the thread for Sentience. Go on - you know you want to...

**Ianpbaker** · May 31st, 2001, 08:02 AM

afternoon all, how are you Gary, long time no speak. Arbiter - how's it going mate. See i did it, a civil question without slating you, whatever next !!

**Arbiter** · May 31st, 2001, 09:15 AM

Oooh, I am proud of you.

Not so bad, not so bad. A little busy at the moment but hanging in there.

I've put a deposit down on a house. A nice little three bedroom detached not to far from my parents. Backs onto a rugby field.

How about you - what you up to?

**Ianpbaker** · May 31st, 2001, 09:20 AM

still slaving away on this project at the moment? lots of problems which have been nothing to do with us developers, but apart from that I'm fine. Off to oxford for the weekend to see a good mate, so that should be fun

**SurfDemon** · May 31st, 2001, 09:38 AM

Q.Whats white and smells of ginger?

A. Fred Astairs finger.

Okay, some of you youngun's may have to ask an irresponsible adult who these oldies are

SD

**barrk** · May 31st, 2001, 09:40 AM

Q. What's invisible and smells like carrots?

A. Bugs Bunny's farts.

As Ian is fond of saying.... *I'll get my coat*

**SurfDemon** · May 31st, 2001, 09:44 AM

I met a priest the other day in a coffee shop. He was doing a crossword, and was stuck on a few clues. The final one was "a description of some-people", it was four letters long ending in -unt.

How was I meant to know that it was aunt???

SD

**Bonker Gudd** · May 31st, 2001, 09:47 AM

Tony Blair is being shown around a hospital. Towards the end of his visit he is taken to a ward with a number of people with no obvious injury.

He greets the first person, and the first person replies:

"Fair fa' yer honest sonsie face,
Great chieftan o' the puddin' race!
Aboot the a' ye tak yer place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o' a' grace
As langs my arm."

Tony, being a wee bit confused, goes to the next person and greets them, and the second person replies:

"Some hae meat, an' canna eat,
And some wad eat that want it,
But we hae meat an' we can eat,
An' sae the Lord be thankit."

Tony, being a muckle confused, goes to the next person and greets them, and the third person replies:

"Wee sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous, beastie,
O, fit a panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi bickerin' brattle!
I wad be laith to rin an chase thee,
Wi murderin' pattle!"

Tony turns to the doctor accompanying him and asks:

"Is this a mental ward?"

"No", replies the doctor, "It's the Burns unit."

**SurfDemon** · May 31st, 2001, 09:57 AM

Excellent Bonker

Are you Scottish, 'cause I haven't heard anyone use the word "muckle" in a long time!

SD

**Gaffer** · May 31st, 2001, 10:10 AM

Heeeeyyyyyy, we got 2 joke threads going at the same time...

*sweat

Ermmmm

*panic

OK

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was
drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one and let the other one off.

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