How Many Professional Programers?

[spetnik]

Just wondering how many members of the forum work in a professional development environment. Name and years of experience would be nice, too.

[spetnik]

Ok, I'll start.

I work at CIBC (Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce) as a web developer. I use VB, ASP, and JavaScript with a SYBASE 11 backend.
I have 2 years experience. I previously worked at MicroSense International, LLC .

[ricmitch_uk]

I'm part-time chief programmer of my own company. The rest of the time, I'm at school.

[tumblingdown]

I did a stint at CIBC (london branch) a few (4 i think) years ago.


td.

[Ianpbaker]

3 years as a contractor for me, speciallising in ASP, but can whip out the odd vb app as well

[Arbiter]

Ian, he said professional. There's nothing professionl about you....

[Ianpbaker]

I'm also a Profesional Pimp, someone has to sell your ass properly.

[Mark Sreeves]

Is this some sort of group therapy?


My name's Mark and I'm a professional programmer.

[tumblingdown]

...I'm coming to terms with it, learning to live with it. Every day, in every way. Small steps...



td.

[Jamagei]

About 10 months experience in the Job. Only just started on this merry road to oblivion....

[Gaffer]

I eat little puppies. Whole.

[Arbiter]

Cool as! Puppy eating!

Ian,

I want a higher cut from now on - Vaseline's so expensive these days!

[chenko]

Im employed as a IT Consultant, But I spend most of the day programming.

I eat pussies in my own time

[Gaffer]

<Crunch crunch crunch>

[spetnik]

Originally posted by Gaffer
I eat little puppies. Whole.

What an interesting Job Decription for a professional programmer.

[Gaffer]

Sorry, more grammatically correct way is:

Description: Puppeymuncher

[ricmitch_uk]

Originally posted by Gaffer
I eat little puppies. Whole.

Just out of interest, has anyone ever got pi$$ed and gone cow-tipping? Or the variation my m8 says he invented, car tipping.

[Jethro]

Originally posted by Jamagei
About 10 months experience on the Job. Only just started on this merry road to oblivion....

He didn't want to know about your sexual expierances. Jes, any chance and your rabbiting on about the wedding tackle.

[Jethro]

Originally posted by Gaffer
I eat little puppies.

THat is so disgusting. Well some one had to make the obvious reference.

[barrk]

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher that he
had found a dog and he thinks it's dead.

"Why do you think it's dead?" she inquired.

"Oh, it's dead for sure." He said.

"How do you know?" she asked.

"Because I pissed in his ear," said the
child innocently.

"You did WHAT?" squealed the teacher in surprise.

"You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst',
and he didn't move."

[Gaffer]

Originally posted by SurfDemon
Their ears aren't really big enough to make into slippers though.

SD

Tut, you should know better than leave the ears mate!!!! They're the tastiest part for chrissakes!!!

Right, I'm off to Barker King for a Poodle-Royale with Fleas....

[Geoff Gunson]

Originally posted by jim mcnamara
My, these threads do degenerate ---

Add up all the years coding mentioned so far, then multiply by 3 - that's my time at this exercise. First started with FORTRAN in 1966.

Mostly I've done OS internals programming in assembly & C, AI stuff, financial apps in Oracle, Access, SQLServer, plus modeling and other crud in a bunch a lot of languages you guys never heard of:
BLISS
APL
LISP
COBOL
SNOBOL (yes, it's real)
ALGOL
Postscript (yes, you CAN code in it, just like Forth)

Some you have heard of:
VB, VBA, ASP, C++, C, MASM32

Some of my asm code may still be out there as part of Fractint or Winfract. Dunno, anymore. Started fractal stuff in ARPANET days on a VAX....

Cobol : I had the misfortune to code with this language in college, something, something, business, orientated, language???

Damned hard.

I am currently a Software Design engineer for a Telecoms company, I have a little under four years and I code in VB, C++.

G

[jim mcnamara]

You want a language that sucks:
LISP (literally infinite strings of parentheses) - nesting 12-15 deep is common.

Forth is also way down there -- everything is bass-ackwards

push roll 3 div
push and roll and 3 are arguments all from or on the stack
div divides - this is how you divide a variable by 3.

Life sucks and then you have to code Forth in Hell.

[SurfDemon]

Originally posted by Gaffer


Right, I'm off to Barker King for a Poodle-Royale with Fleas....

Laughing my arse off at that one

As for COBOL wasn't it Common Business Orientated Language. Worked in it for a year at ICL, hated it. I kept spelling Organsation correctly and it would spew up with a completely meaningless error message. Then eventually I would realise that I had to spell Organisation with a Z to make it work. Bollocks I say.

APL (Didn;'t that stand for A Programming Language - how lazy is that )

Did LISP in college for AI work. It sucked even more than COBOL - which in itself is quite an achievement.

I tried to get into Forth on the old Jupiter Ace but decided it wasn't written by a total nutter.

Never used Fortran 66 (or whatever) but used Fortran 77 a lot and it rocked. One of the best language ever for doing all the modelling stuff.

SD

[ricmitch_uk]

Sorry you guys, but these seem like dinosour languages to me, the type of stuff you hear about in stories you hear when your IT teacher's reminsing of his days in College, programming FORTRAN & COBOL whilst doing weed.
I first learned QBASIC (1.1), then went to Turbo Pascal(4.5), and then I started internet stuff, (HTML, Java, Scripting). The last language I tried to learn was C++, but I made the mistake of buying a crap book, so I didn't understand much of it.

[spetnik]

Originally posted by SurfDemon

I kept spelling Organsation correctly and it would spew up with a completely meaningless error message. Then eventually I would realise that I had to spell Organisation with a Z to make it work. Bollocks I say.

Hey Canuck! u spell like a brit! the right way is organization (see http://www.dictionary.com).

O, and the Flames suck!
(Hmm, all the CANADIAN teams are eliminated, wow!)

[spetnik]

wait, did i say "eliminated"? How many Canadian teams were even contenders?

[SurfDemon]

Originally posted by spetnik


Hey Canuck! u spell like a brit! the right way is organization (see http://www.dictionary.com).

O, and the Flames suck!
(Hmm, all the CANADIAN teams are eliminated, wow!)

I should hope so, I'm still a Brit according to my passport. Besides lets see, we invented the language... that means that our spellings correct.....

Oh, and yeah, the Flames do Suck. I haven't really got into Ice Hockey yet, they serve sh*t beer at the games.

SD

[SurfDemon]

Oh yeah and this is what dictionary.com has to say about Organisation

organisation n 1: the persons (or committees or departments etc.) who make up a governing body and who administer something; "he claims that the present administration is corrupt"; "the governance of an association is responsible to its members"; "he quickly became recognized as a member of the establishment" [syn: administration, governance, establishment, brass, organization] 2: a group of people who work together [syn: organization] 3: an organized structure for arranging or classifying; "he changed the arrangement of the topics"; "the facts were familiar but it was in the organization of them that he was original"; "he tried to understand their system of classification" [syn: arrangement, organization, system] 4: an ordered manner; orderliness by virtue of being methodical and well organized; "his compulsive organization was not an endearing quality"; "we can't do it unless we establish some system around here" [syn: organization, system] 5: the act of organizing a business or business-related activity; "he was brought in to supervise the organization of a new department" [syn: organization] 6: the activity or result of distributing or disposing persons or things properly or methodically; "in this new organization the container is much smaller" [syn: organization, arrangement] 7: the act of forming something; "the constitution of a PTA group"; "he still remembers the establishment of the hospital" [syn: constitution, establishment, formation, organization]

This is the correct spelling of Organisation although some Americans may spell it incorrectly as Organization. See COBOL, Illiterate, Dumb-Ass and Americans.

Note the American spellings all the way through. Organize and Recognize.

By the way it's called a Zed not a Zee

Tee Hee (No Offence).

SD

[spetnik]

Well, I'm a St. Louis fan (yes, , calgary did beat us a buncha years back in the playoffs, but at least we've made the playoffs the past 30+ years). St. Louis, the home of Anheuser Busch. Budweiser, Michelob, Tequiza, Odouls, Busch.... man, i'm gettin a buzz just talkin .
But I do know what it feels like to be in a city w/ a poor hockey team. I now live in NYC. AND THE RANGERS SUCK!!!

[SurfDemon]

Now if only Calgary had a world class female mud-wrestling team.....


SD

[spetnik]

Originally posted by SurfDemon
Oh yeah and this is what dictionary.com has to say about Organisation


Note the American spellings all the way through. Organize and Recognize.

By the way it's called a Zed not a Zee

Tee Hee (No Offence).

SD

ok, now i feel stupid.
Actually, i dont. U know jolly well that language changes. Nobody says "Thou art" do they? Dont get left behind with evolution, look what happened to the gorillas (actually, I'm religious, i dont believe in that stuff [see my uncle's (Lee Spetner) book called Not By Chance ).
Anyway, as I always say, I try not to associate w/ a country who goes to war wearing bright red and marching in straight lines.

[SurfDemon]

I'm only joking with you, I think it's healthy that language evolves seperately.

Yeah, that was a bit of a lame ass way of doing battle wasn't it. Unfortunately we ddn't really learn until the first world war that marching down on the enemy doesn't wrk any-more. It used to though.

We haven't really come up with all that many innovations in warfare for a long time. You Americans seem to have come up with all the most recent ones... friendly fire, napalm, non-violent training for your special forces, did I mention friendly fire ???

SD

[spetnik]

Yeah, friendly fire. That was a result of the "CIVIL" war.
I c once i get u w/ a good point, u finally concede, aye?

[SurfDemon]

Oh Certainly. I'm under no illusions that America deliberately started spelling words differently, you have such a large mixture of cultures that a few changes are inevitable. I just like yanking peoples chains and seeing if they react.

I love a good well reasoned argument. Not so that it degenerates into childish name calling, but one with good well reasoned arguments on both sides. Usually your countrymen are an easy target because they react so vociferously to any anti-american comment, but you seem far too sensible for that

If I slag off a Kanuck, Brit or Ozzie then they'll more than likely agree with me, where's the fun in that?

And yeah, If I'm wrong in an argument (as I frequently am) I always admit it. Nobody likes a bad loser.

Cheers,

SD

[barrk]

I love a good well reasoned argument. Not so that it degenerates into childish name calling, but one with good well reasoned arguments on both sides. Usually your countrymen are an easy target because they react so vociferously to any anti-american comment, but you seem far too sensible for that

***! How can you say that you bastard. Go screw yourself and your little dog too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anti-American people should all be taken out and shot with AK-47s.....and then electrocuted!

[SurfDemon]

Originally posted by barrk


***! How can you say that you bastard. Go screw yourself and your little dog too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anti-American people should all be taken out and shot with AK-47s.....and then electrocuted!

I'd be safe anyway Katie. You guys would end up killing each other in friendly fire incidents with the AK-47s, the power would black out as I was strapped to the chair and the death sentance would be delayed indefinetaly despite the fact that you had a signed confession from me pleading guilty and overwhelming evidence.



SD

[barrk]

Hehehe

[parksie]

Anyway, nobody can handle abuse like us Brits We take so much sh*te from everywhere and come up smelling of...erm...sh*te

[Jethro]

Originally posted by ricmitch_uk
Sorry you guys, but these seem like dinosour languages to me, the type of stuff you hear about in stories you hear when your IT teacher's reminsing of his days in College, programming FORTRAN & COBOL whilst doing weed.
I first learned QBASIC (1.1), then went to Turbo Pascal(4.5), and then I started internet stuff, (HTML, Java, Scripting). The last language I tried to learn was C++, but I made the mistake of buying a crap book, so I didn't understand much of it.

Sorry to disappoint you dude but COBOL is alive (bad choice of word) and powering away at various banks and financial institutions around the world. Generally cause they have invested a whole sh*t load of money in the software, and it is like totally mission critical.