What a pig!

**Juan Carlos Rey** · May 12th, 2001, 01:33 AM

If you screamed for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you'll produce enough energy to heat a coffee cup.
(Not interesting)

The orgasm of a pig lasts 30 minutes.
(¡30 minutes!)

By shaking your head against a wall, you waste 150 calories an hour.
(I kept thinking about the pig)

A cockroach will live 8 days without its head, and then will dye by starvation.
(¡I envy the pig !)

Lions use to mate up to 50 times a day.
(I prefer the pig way, quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste thir own legs.
(I tried, but couldn't reach mine)

The elephant is the only mammal that can't jump.
(30 minutes, the pig is very lucky!)

Orine from cats glows under fluorescent light.
(Do you realize? 30 minutes!)

The eye of the ostrich is bigger than its brain.
(I know people like that)

Sea stars have no brain.
(I know people like that too)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(The pig is a master!)

Dolphins are the only mammals (besides humans) that make sex just for fun.
(What about the pig? Can a pig mate a dolphin?)

(30 minutes! Wow!)

Now I undestand why my wife keeps telling me "You're such a pig!"

**Jeff_1** · May 12th, 2001, 01:37 AM

30MINS!!!!!!!!!! OH ****!!!!!!! WOOOOHOOOOOO

**Pix** · May 12th, 2001, 12:11 PM

Did you know that if you drank 15 gallons of water in 24 hours you would be drunk! Might try it someday and I'll let you know if it works

**kedaman** · May 12th, 2001, 12:30 PM

I think i can beat the pig

**Pix** · May 12th, 2001, 12:40 PM

I'm left-handed, also get called pig sometimes. Strange

**kedaman** · May 12th, 2001, 12:43 PM

maybe they just accidentally misspell Pix, like they do with me

**Pix** · May 12th, 2001, 12:44 PM

Maybe. I like pigs anyway

**parksie** · May 12th, 2001, 01:09 PM

Hopefully not in that way...

Jethro · May 13th, 2001, 05:30 PM

Originally posted by kedaman
I think i can beat the pig

There are probably two Pixs oops two Pigs involved in the 30 minutes keddie, a solo mission doesn't count

denniswrenn · May 13th, 2001, 05:33 PM

Originally posted by Pix
Did you know that if you drank 15 gallons of water in 24 hours you would be drunk! Might try it someday and I'll let you know if it works

Naaah, I don't think you should try it.. the L.D.50 for water is somewhere around 12 gallons

chenko · May 13th, 2001, 05:44 PM

Originally posted by Pix
Did you know that if you drank 15 gallons of water in 24 hours you would be drunk! Might try it someday and I'll let you know if it works

15 gallons? whats that in liters? How do they know you will get drunk? had someone done it...I think I will give it a go, as I drink as least 8-10 liters day.

Orine from cats glows under fluorescent light.

Is that ment to be "Urine" ?

**HarryW** · May 13th, 2001, 05:50 PM

It't 68.19 litres if you're talking British gallons. American gallons are a bit smaller I think, so it's about... 55 litres?

**Good Dreams** · May 13th, 2001, 06:10 PM

Just wondering... Women are said to have multiple orgasms. So.. what's the frequence? 1 per 2 seconds?

denniswrenn · May 13th, 2001, 06:13 PM

I thought it was like more than one at the same time.....

chenko · May 13th, 2001, 06:41 PM

Originally posted by denniswrenn
I thought it was like more than one at the same time.....

Its more than one in a row...

68 liters!!! WOAH!! I dont think I could do that!

**Good Dreams** · May 14th, 2001, 12:34 PM

I just asked because my upstairs neighbour has very noisy and long orgasms, which prevent me from sleeping sometimes, and I wondered if it was due to multiple orgasms. Seeing this new piece of information, it might be possible that she is in fact a pig

She also makes lots of noise when she's walking, like pigs do!...

**barrk** · May 14th, 2001, 12:39 PM

A man was sued by a woman for defamation of character. She charged
that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined.
After the trial he asked the judge, "This means that I cannot call
Mrs. Johnson a pig?"

The judge said that was true. "Does this mean I cannot call a pig
Mrs. Johnson?" the man asked.

The judge replied that he could indeed call a pig Mrs. Johnson with
no fear of legal action.

The man looked directly at Mrs. Johnson and said, "Good afternoon,
Mrs. Johnson."

**chrisjk** · May 14th, 2001, 03:59 PM

Originally posted by Good Dreams
I just asked because my upstairs neighbour has very noisy and long orgasms

David, when can I move in?!

**Good Dreams** · May 14th, 2001, 04:47 PM

Well Chris... If it's for shut her mouth and fix her noisy bed, I'll "take care" of her husband(s) for you.

denniswrenn · May 14th, 2001, 04:52 PM

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

**barrk** · May 14th, 2001, 04:58 PM

I don't think he meant it the way that you took it Dennis...at least I hope not.

**barrk** · May 14th, 2001, 04:58 PM

Not that there's anything wrong with that of course!

denniswrenn · May 14th, 2001, 05:02 PM

Of course not

**Good Dreams** · May 14th, 2001, 05:09 PM

Originally posted by Good Dreams
shut her mouth

You mean this ?!

No, no! That's not what you were thinking!

chenko · May 14th, 2001, 06:46 PM

Originally posted by Good Dreams

You mean this ?!
No, no! That's not what you were thinking!

More like fill it

**Juan Carlos Rey** · May 14th, 2001, 09:50 PM

Yes, it should be Urine. Dats for I am forign and not spik Inglish Bery Guell. Xcuse me Plis.
But Orgasm is Orgasm.
And my wife do have multiple orgasms, I assure you, one every two to three seconds.

**Good Dreams** · May 15th, 2001, 02:06 PM

Juan: the links on this thread might be usefull for you.

Forum Feedback: Languages

Simon: I didn't say that!

**parksie** · May 15th, 2001, 02:09 PM

Dats for I am forign and not spik Inglish Bery Guell. Xcuse me Plis.

Shertunly

Jethro · May 15th, 2001, 04:48 PM

Originally posted by Good Dreams
I just asked because my upstairs neighbour has very noisy and long orgasms, which prevent me from sleeping sometimes, and I wondered if it was due to multiple orgasms. Seeing this new piece of information, it might be possible that she is in fact a pig
She also makes lots of noise when she's walking, like pigs do!...

You could probably get more sleep if you stopped using the water glass on the ceiling to listen in

**Good Dreams** · May 15th, 2001, 05:18 PM

It's surround sound. I don't need the glass. I just need a hole in the ceiling to enjoy the show.

Jethro · May 15th, 2001, 05:32 PM

Originally posted by Good Dreams
It's surround sound. I don't need the glass. I just need a hole in the ceiling to enjoy the show.

And l just bet your Dad is wondering just what you are doing with his toolbox. Still better than that scene in American Pie

denniswrenn · May 15th, 2001, 07:05 PM

When he's screwing the sock or the pie?!?

**Juan Carlos Rey** · May 15th, 2001, 07:05 PM

Please don't blame me for one single TYPE error!
And Altavista translator really sucks!

denniswrenn · May 15th, 2001, 07:07 PM

does it suck as much as the vacuum pump?

**Juan Carlos Rey** · May 15th, 2001, 07:37 PM

Hi, David. I translated your previous reply to Spanish and then back to English. Watch the results:

"It is surrounds the sound. I do not need the crystal. Hardly I need a hole in the ceiling to enjoy the demonstration"

You can try yourself.

Surprisingly, the vacuum pump stuff translated OK.

BTW, it's time to change my sign!

Jethro · May 15th, 2001, 08:59 PM

Originally posted by denniswrenn
When he's screwing the sock or the pie?!?

The pie

**Good Dreams** · May 16th, 2001, 10:02 AM

Well Juan,

It's good for certain things only. A translator will never translate a poem correctly neither a word with various meanings.

(polissemic?)

A more "scientific" text will be translated more correctly I think.
Personaly, I only need an english/english dictionnary.

**spud** · May 16th, 2001, 05:34 PM

This site is so cool!

Women have orgasms!

Must happen when I'm sleeping!

Jethro · May 16th, 2001, 06:06 PM

Originally posted by spud
This site is so cool!

Women have orgasms!

Must happen when I'm sleeping!

Post your sex techniques so we can all get a laugh

**spud** · May 17th, 2001, 12:39 PM

I dont have many however I'm pretty good!

I come every time!

Was with a girl once, I thought I was doing great she couldn't control herself all over the place puffing and panting groning etc

First time I ever seen an asthma attack!

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