Dogs

[Mark Sreeves]

I've got 2 mad labradors one black and one yellow.

chrismitchell's got himself

what sort of dog have you other dudes got(if any )??

[CyberSurfer]

A mongrel, kind of a cross between a Jack Russel and a few other bits n' pieces..

[Bonker Gudd]

Bonker Gudd, Dog Exterminator.
Boxers a Speciality

[chrismitchell]

Originally posted by Mark Sreeves

chrismitchell's got himself

Woof!

[Jamagei]

I have cats and a rabbit and a hampster
and i'll beat the crap out of any one who thinks i am queer because of it...

I am looking in your direction Harry

[HarryW]

Who, me?

[PJB]

i had a dog but i could never get him trained not to drink out of blenders, in retrospect i suppose i shouldn't have turned it on to teach him a lesson

[parksie]

LOL

I prefer cats to dogs...they're more independent

[chrismitchell]

Woof! Again...

I like cats too... they taste great on Toast!

[barrk]

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.

Dogs miss you when you're gone.

Dogs look at your eyes.

Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.

Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.

Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.

Dogs understand what "no" means.

Dogs don't brag about whom they have slept with.

Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch
(and they never laugh at how you throw).

Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent,
because they know the most important thing is that you're together.

Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.

Dogs think you are a culinary genius.

Dogs are nice to your relatives.

Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.

Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.

Dogs admit it when they're lost.

Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.

Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.

Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

Dogs mean it when they kiss you.

You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.

You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.

You can train a dog.

You can force a dog to take a bath.

Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.

Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.

The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas.
(OK, the *really* worst disease you can get from them is rabies,
but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)

[SurfDemon]

Dogs can lick their testicles....


... I've always been jealous of the feat.....



... until I found out that if I gave him a biscuit he would let me do it too

SD

[parksie]

Having just eaten the dog food
Lister: Now I know why dogs lick their testicles. It's to take away the taste of the food.

...from Red Dwarf

[barrk]

Both take up too much space on the bed.

Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaners.

Both are threatened by their own kind.

Both mark their territory.

Both are suspicious of the postman.

Both are bad at asking you questions.

Both fart shamelessly.

Both like dominance games.

Both tend to smell riper with age.

Neither of them tells you what's bothering them.

Neither of them does dishes.

Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.

Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.

Neither understands what you see in cats.

The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.

[SurfDemon]

Nice one Jethro!!!!




SD

[Lethal]

I have an english bulldog named Sammy. She's great, whenver she want outside or out of a room, she head butts the door for a few minutes, or untill someone lets her out...

Surf Demon, every time I read one of your posts, I about fall off my chair laughing my ass off.

[chrismitchell]

Again Woof! (ps Nice one Jethro!!)

[SurfDemon]

Originally posted by Lethal

Surf Demon, every time I read one of your posts, I about fall off my chair laughing my ass off.

Thanks,.......


... unless your talking about my answers to VB questions in the main forum, in which case .... Doh!

SD

[barrk]

Men only have two feet to track in mud.

Men can buy you presents.

Men don't have to play with every man they see
when you take them around the block.

Men open their own cans.

Men don't eat cat poo on the sly.

Men don't shed as much, and if they do, they hide it.

Men don't drool. Well, most don't.

Men can do math stuff.

Men don't have to go to the vet to have their anal glands expelled.

When men have to go outside in the rain, they don't stand in the doorway and whine.

Dogs have dog-breath ALL the time.

Holiday Inns accept men.