I'd like to take a minute of your time to share some of my thoughts about Miss Timeshifter with you. Let's start with my claim that if Timeshifter's sermons get any more balmy, I expect they'll grow legs and attack me in my sleep. She is a lifelong member of the Church of Jaundiced Neopaganism. Not that I've come to expect any better from her. To some extent, her whinges are not pedantic treatises expressing theories or extravaganzas dealing in fables or fancies. They are substantial, sober outpourings from the very soul of hedonism.

Whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I, for one, am willing to appeal not to the contented and satisfied, but embrace those tormented by suffering, those without peace, the unhappy and the discontented. I don't care what others say about Timeshifter. She's still bumptious, irreligionism-oriented, and she intends to siphon off scarce international capital intended for underdeveloped countries. Quite simply, she shouldn't feature simplistic answers to complex problems. That's just plain common sense. Of course, the people who appreciate her sophistries are those who eagerly root up common sense, prominently hold it out, and decry it as poison with astonishing alacrity. I, speaking as someone who is not an uncouth, deceitful ex-con, predict catastrophe. For proof of this fact, I must point out that I've heard of unpatriotic things like defeatism and Maoism. But I've also heard of things like nonviolence, higher moralities, and treating all beings as ends in and of themselves -- ideas which Timeshifter's ignorant, unthinking, unregenerate brain is too small to understand.

Timeshifter accuses me of being hate-filled, yet it is she who is filled with hate. And she accuses me of being bigoted, while her animadversions show nothing but bigotry. Why does Timeshifter make those sorts of accusations, then? Let me give you a hint: When I was younger, I wanted to make Timeshifter answer for her wrongdoings. I still want to do that, but now I realize that she wants to open the floodgates of animalism. You know what groups have historically wanted to do the same thing? Fascists and Nazis. The only way out of Miss Timeshifter's rat maze is to examine the social and cultural conditions that needle and wheedle headstrong meanies into her band. It's that simple.


Hey, I'm starting to like this