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Thread: Your mother is SO fat...

  1. #1
    Behemoth
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    She had to get her ears pierced so you could see the TV.

  2. #2
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    Yo mamma's so fat when she sits on the beach, the tide comes in...
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  3. #3
    Guest
    and yo momma's so fat Greenpeace tried to tow her back to sea.

  4. #4
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    Yo momma's so fat she can't go in the sea 'cos she's scared of Ahab!
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  5. #5
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    AND 'cos she's a hazard to international shipping!
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  6. #6
    Guest
    Your momma's so fat, scientist believe that if she eats one more pie, she'll become a black hole!

  7. #7
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    DAMN, *I* was going to use that one!

    Yo momma's so fat she's the sole cause of global warming!
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  8. #8
    Guest
    Your mother's so fat she's got her own satellite system.

    PS: a prezzie for you.

  9. #9
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    Yo momma's so fat if she went on a diet, several underdeveloped countries would have enough food to eat...

    PS - Thanks for the prezzie!
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  10. #10
    Guest
    I was just going to use that one..!

    http://expage.com/page/yomammasofat

  11. #11
    PowerPoster
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    Your momma's so fat, she's in 2 different time zones

    Or alternatively

    Your momma's so fat, she has her own Zip/Postal code

  12. #12
    Guest
    Ok slight change

    Your momma's so stupid, she sat all day staring at a carton of orange juice coz it said "concentrate"

  13. #13
    Fanatic Member zmerlinz's Avatar
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    Just a small point, who's "momma" are we talking about ???

    Some people have told me they don't think a fat penguin really embodies the grace of Linux, which just tells me they have never seen a angry penguin charging at them in excess of 100mph. They'd be a lot more careful about what they say if they had.
    -- Linus Torvalds

    [Galahtech.com] | [My Site] | [Fishsponge] | [UnixForum.co.uk]

  14. #14
    Guest
    it doesnt matter, come and join the fun.

  15. #15
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    Yo momma's so fat I had to roll over twice before I got off her!

    (sorry)
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  16. #16
    Addicted Member Geoff Gunson's Avatar
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    Your momma's so fat she has fat ladies orbiting her!

    G

  17. #17
    Lively Member Jamagei's Avatar
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    running from you. You freak.
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    how do you make love to your momma?

    slap her thighs and ride the waves in.

    your momma is so fat she has more chins than a chinese phone book
    Now, aren't you sorry you didn't just keep on scrolling?

  18. #18
    Hyperactive Member Pix's Avatar
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    Oh dear...your momma's so fat that if she sat in the Grand Canyon she'd get stuck! Or, if she wore high heels she'd stike oil!

  19. #19
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    Yo mamma's so fat when she sits around the house, she really sits AROUND the house.

    {Insert random techno-babble here}

    {Insert quote from some long gone mofo here}

  20. #20
    Frenzied Member
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    yomama.com
    go there, and keep refreshing for new jokes
    NXSupport - Your one-stop source for computer help

  21. #21
    Guest
    Yo momma's so fat, when she tripped and fell...everyone yelled, "TIMBER!!!"


  22. #22
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    Yo mama's so fat she uses a blanket as a washcloth

    and

    Yo mama's so fat her belt size is equator
    {Insert random techno-babble here}

    {Insert quote from some long gone mofo here}

  23. #23
    Fanatic Member ExtremePimpness's Avatar
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    Your mama's so fat she makes my momma look skinny


    (Broken Home)

  24. #24
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    Yo mama's so fat........huh?!?.........AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! {muffled sounds coming out of yo mama's a** followed by sound of YoungBuck's neck snapping.
    {Insert random techno-babble here}

    {Insert quote from some long gone mofo here}

  25. #25
    Lively Member
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    I just noticed.. and you can call me crazy but I think that Arbiter and Behemoth are the same person... just call it intuition.

  26. #26
    Hyperactive Member barrk's Avatar
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    I think they're just Buds...mates.....pals....whatever

  27. #27
    Monday Morning Lunatic parksie's Avatar
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    Just "friends"
    I refuse to tie my hands behind my back and hear somebody say "Bend Over, Boy, Because You Have It Coming To You".
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  28. #28
    Hyperactive Member Warmaster199's Avatar
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    A couple old ones

    Yo momma's so fat that when she went to school, she sat beside everyone.

    Yo momma's so fat she thought a school bus was a twinkie.

    Yo momma's so fat but she's not as fat as my mom!(Just a joke. My ma wieghs 110).

    Yo momma's so fat she had trouble getting off the couch.

    Yo momma's so fat that when you were born, the doctors took 5 hours to get you unwedged from "the cheeks".

    Yo momma's so fat that when she went swimming with the whales, they started singing "We are Family".

  29. #29
    Lively Member
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    Your momma is so hairy, she has afros on her nipples!

  30. #30
    Hyperactive Member Warmaster199's Avatar
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    LMAO!!! OH GOD!!!

  31. #31
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    Your momma is so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway!

  32. #32
    coder. Lord Orwell's Avatar
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    :gettin in on the action:

    "your mamma is so fat, she jumped up in the air...
    And got stuck!"

    ugly:
    "Your momma is so ugly when she walks by restrooms the toilets flush"

    "But seriously, Lets get off mommas. I just got off yours."
    My light show youtube page (it's made the news) www.youtube.com/@lightsofelberfeld
    Contact me on the socials www.facebook.com/lordorwell

  33. #33
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    skinny mama's

    yo mama's so skinny she has to run around in the shower to get wet

    yo mama's so skinny she use a dorrito as a hangglider
    {Insert random techno-babble here}

    {Insert quote from some long gone mofo here}

  34. #34
    Frenzied Member HarryW's Avatar
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    Yo mamma's so skinny she could hula-hoop through a cheerio.

    (I stole that from a film... remember which one?)
    Harry.

    "From one thing, know ten thousand things."

  35. #35
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    Your momma is so greasy, she sweats Crisco.

  36. #36
    coder. Lord Orwell's Avatar
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    Your momma reminds me of a butcher's freezer.
    Fresh meat goes in and out every day.
    My light show youtube page (it's made the news) www.youtube.com/@lightsofelberfeld
    Contact me on the socials www.facebook.com/lordorwell

  37. #37
    Guest
    Trust me, Arbiter and I are 2 separate entities... At least I hope so...

  38. #38
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    Oh yes, most certainly.

    I'm of average height, smart and debonair.

    Behemoth is huge and hairy (hence he was christened Behemoth), pretty much what you expect from a web developer really.
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

  39. #39
    Guest
    smart and debonnaire?!
    You're a programmer and analyst!


  40. #40
    PowerPoster Arbiter's Avatar
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    There's nothing wrong with being and anal-cyst. Leave me alone!

    And I can only sort of program anyway.

    Couldn't find that eMail by the way - we'll have to redefine the components.

    To the crystal dome.......

    (or project communications forum)
    Gentile or Jew,
    O you who turn the wheel and look to windward,
    Consider Phlebas, who was once handsome and tall as you...

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