Lame Programming

[mendhak]

Let's join our varyingly limited intellects and make the absolute lamest VB program ever!!!

We'll distribute it as a shareware, and charge heavy fees to any people stupid enough to want the full version, which will simply be a new splash screen with "full version" written on it.

[OrdinaryGuy]

count me in.. where do we start?

[simonm]

I'll start you off...

Public Sub Main()
' Put some code in here...
 
End Sub

[OrdinaryGuy]

Public Sub Main()
  Do
  Loop
End Sub

[tr0n]

but we want the user to be able to do *something* with it...

Public Sub Main()
    Dim i As Integer
 
    Do While i <= 10
        MsgBox "Loading... (" & i & "secs remaining)"
        i = i + 1
    Loop
End Sub

[mendhak]

Public Sub Main()
    Dim i As Integer
 
    Do While i <= 10
        MsgBox "Loading... (" & i & "secs remaining)"
        i = i + 1
    Loop
 
MsgBox "Loaded! Congratulations!"
Msgbox "Press OK to continue, or Cancel to go on."
 
End Sub

[tr0n]

Public Sub Main()
    Dim i As Integer
 
    Do While i <= 10
        MsgBox "Loading... (" & i & "secs remaining)"
        i = i + 1
    Loop
 
MsgBox "Loaded! Congratulations!"
Msgbox "Press OK to continue, or Cancel to go on."
 
If vbOK = 1 Then
    Form1.Show
Else
    End
End If
End Sub

[Hampster]

_

[arsmakman]

That is the most irritating thing I ever saw. Dammit.

So do NOT click here

[NotLKH]

How about this:

Dim NumberHits(2) As Long
 
Private Sub cmdBut_Click(Index As Integer)
Dim I As Long
Dim R_Num As Long
Randomize
R_Num = Int(Rnd * 200) Mod 2
Select Case Index
    Case 2
        For I = 0 To 2
            NumberHits(I) = 0
        Next I
        lblHit(0) = "Number Right: 0"
        lblHit(1) = "Number Wrong: 0"
        lblHit(2) = "Psychic Rating: 0 out of 100"
    Case Else
        NumberHits(2) = NumberHits(2) + 1
        If R_Num = Index Then
            NumberHits(0) = NumberHits(0) + 1   'Right
        Else
            NumberHits(1) = NumberHits(1) + 1   'Right
        End If
        lblHit(0) = "Number Right: " & NumberHits(0)
        lblHit(1) = "Number Wrong: " & NumberHits(1)
        lblHit(2) = "Psychic Rating: " & Int(100 * (NumberHits(0) / NumberHits(2))) & " out of 100"
End Select
End Sub
 
Private Sub Form_Load()
    Call cmdBut_Click(2)
End Sub

Throw in a Msg(100) string array with various comments,
And it should be easily marketable.

At lets say a Buck a pop, who wouldn't love it!

[Jack Daniels]

Originally posted by mendhak

Public Sub Main()
    Dim i As Integer
 
    Do While i <= 10
        MsgBox "Loading... (" & i & "secs remaining)"
        i = i + 1
    Loop
 
MsgBox "Loaded! Congratulations!"
Msgbox "Press OK to continue, or Cancel to go on."
 
End Sub

LOL that was f***en hilarious dude, and im not even stoned lmao.

[tr0n]

i thought this was going to be a collaboration from all of us (like the thread where everyone adds a bit to a story), rather than just posting your own thing.

[Jack Daniels]

well start another but lay down a few rules in the first post first...

[tr0n]

can't be arsed

[Michael_Kamen]

Allright, I'll start a new one:

Option Explicit

[Jack Daniels]

okies

Option Explicit
Dim x as Integer

[Michael_Kamen]

Option Explicit
Dim x as Integer
On Error Resume Next

[Wally Pipp]

Your message box is faulty. It should read :

MsgBox "Continue ? Press 'yes' for no and 'no' for yes, 'cancel' for both.", vbOkOnly, "The Twilight zone"

[simonm]

Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x as Integer
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
End Sub

[tr0n]

Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x as Integer
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
  x = x / 0
End Sub

[Michael_Kamen]

Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x as Integer
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
  x = x / 0
  if x > 0 then Msgbox "There is something wrong with your calculation!"
End Sub

[simonm]

Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x As Integer
  Dim y As Long
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
  x = x / 0
 
  If Err Then
    y = 40000
  End If
 
  if x > 0 then Msgbox "There is something wrong with your calculation!"
 
End Sub

[tr0n]

'Module 1
Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x As Long
  Dim y As Long
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
  x = x / 0
 
  If Err Then
    y = 40000
  End If
 
  If x > 0 then Msgbox "There is something wrong with your calculation!"
 
  y = y
  If y = y = True Then x = y
  If x = y And y = x Then
    x = x
 
    'impress the user with amazing graphical abilities
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
  End If
End Sub
 
'Form1
Option Explicit
 
Private Sub Form_Load()
 
End Sub

[MrPolite]

I say you should inform the user early on about terminating the app:

MsgBox "Welcome! To terminate the application at anytime, press the X button ( not the one on your calculator). You can also shot down windows to terminate the program."

[Michael_Kamen]

'Module 1
Option Explicit
 
Public Sub Main()
  Dim x As Long
  Dim y As Long
 
  On Error Resume Next
 
  x = x / 0
 
  If Err Then
    y = 40000
  End If
 
  If x > 0 then Msgbox "There is something wrong with your calculation!"
 
  y = y
  If y = y = True Then x = y
  If x = y And y = x Then
    x = x
 
    'impress the user with amazing graphical abilities
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
    Unload Form1
    Form1.Show
  End If
End Sub
 
'Form1
Option Explicit
 
Private Sub Form_Load()
While Msgbox ("Click the cancel button to start the application",Vbokonly or vbInformation, "<Title goes here>") <> VbCancel
Wend
 
End Sub

[Michael_Kamen]

When do we start distributing the full version for high fees?

[duc]

whoa whoa, im the lamest programmer


Private Sub Form_Load()

Unload Me

End Sub