As you can tell, I am bored today.

First of all, I am allergic to them. That can be part of the reason. They make me sneeze, my eyes tear, and I get itchy all over.

Secondly, they don't like water! What kind of friggin' mammal doesn't like water? A stupid one! "Excuse me Mr. Tubbins, it's time for you bath."
"No thank you, I'll just lick myself clean!"

Thirdly, cats are not dogs. You can play with and they are your best friend. They give you unconditional love until you spade or neuter them. Then they forget and forgive you after a couple of days. Dogs are fun. Cats are not. They would rather you clean their dirty, disgusting, germ-filled litter box than to have anything to do with you.

Forthly, cats cough up hairballs from cleaning themselves. And then they leave these hairballs in your shoes for you!

The one good thing about cats is that they make good Chinesse food.

...and that is my rant for the day.