We want witty testimonials from all your Sandpaper fans out there!

The sort of thing like when you see film-critics' comments on movie posters.

I'll start us off...


"I'm was so impressed with sandpaper, I put my NAME on it!" - G. Forman

or

"I've been a torturer for 30 years now and nothing gets results like *NEW* Sandpaper 1.42" - Barry Pincers.