The following are actual English subtitles used in
films from Hong Kong

* I am darn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.
* Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.
* Gun wounds again?
* Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.
* A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries.
* Darn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken
* Take my advice, or I'll spank you a lot.
* Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?
* This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am
sure you will not mind that I remove your toenails and leave them
out on the dessert floor for ants to eat.
* Quiet or I'll blow your throat up.
* I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out !
* I will surround their house by myself.
* You daring lousy guy.
* Beat him out of recognizable shape!
* Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short
rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your doctor for a
thorough extermination.
* I have been scared silly too much lately.
* I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair!
* Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.
* The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?
* How can you use my intestines as a gift?
* Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up
together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate
feets on some but of the giant lizard person.
* Your western eyes will be fingered from your face.
* This hot sword will pierce your family dynasty.
* The Americans will not save you for Christmas.
* Both of you will die when the sun hits the bell.
* Feeling sexual we will invade into your women.
* You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken.

Thought you may like these, one of the 12 joke of the day e-mails in this morning's inbox. Enjoy!

Alex Read