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Nov 30th, 2001, 01:50 PM
#1
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
Who Is Jack Schitt???
The History of Jack Schitt
The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Read on and you'll be able to handle the situation intelligently.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep & Schitt, Inc.
Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple begat 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins, Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents' wishes, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After 15 years of marriage, Jack & Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married a Mr. Sherlock, and out of devotion to her children, decided to hyphenate her last name, and became Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Dip Schitt married a woman named Loda Dung, who became Loda Schitt. The couple produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt.
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, inseparable throughout childhood subsequently married the Happens brothers. The local newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding, which was quite an event. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He returned from his travels with his Italian bride, Piza Schitt.
So, NOW if someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can beg to differ. You not only know Jack Schitt, but the entire Schitt list
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Nov 30th, 2001, 01:55 PM
#2
Educational and enlightening
Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Cry, and you just water down your vodka.
Take credit, not responsibility
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Nov 30th, 2001, 01:56 PM
#3
Fanatic Member
thank you katie, I almost had tears of laughter with that
Yeah, well I'm gonna build my own lunar space lander! With blackjack aaaaannd Hookers! Actually, forget the space lander, and the blackjack. Ahhhh forget the whole thing!
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Nov 30th, 2001, 02:16 PM
#4
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
Glad I could help! My Dad sent that to me believe it or not!?!?!?!?!
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Nov 30th, 2001, 02:52 PM
#5
Fanatic Member
I wonder where someone gets their sence of humour from then  
Yeah, well I'm gonna build my own lunar space lander! With blackjack aaaaannd Hookers! Actually, forget the space lander, and the blackjack. Ahhhh forget the whole thing!
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Nov 30th, 2001, 02:58 PM
#6
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
My parents are weird........
at Thanksgiving I was telling a story that had an old reference in it and my Dad said "Becareful, Kathryn, you're dating yourself".
My Mom pipes up and says "Dating yourself???? Is that like Masturbation???"
My Ian thought it was hysterical and almost squirted cider out of his nose.
Geesh! Some people.
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Nov 30th, 2001, 03:04 PM
#7
Fanatic Member
interesting line's of conversation you have in your house hold
Yeah, well I'm gonna build my own lunar space lander! With blackjack aaaaannd Hookers! Actually, forget the space lander, and the blackjack. Ahhhh forget the whole thing!
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Nov 30th, 2001, 03:07 PM
#8
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
It's a wonder any of us turned out semi-normal.....maybe there's luck for my kids after all.
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Nov 30th, 2001, 03:14 PM
#9
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
Nah, normal is highly over-rated. I'll settle for semi-normal.
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Nov 30th, 2001, 03:23 PM
#10
PowerPoster
Ohh, how I laughed
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Nov 30th, 2001, 04:02 PM
#11
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
Laughed at the joke, me or my parents?!?!?!?!
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Nov 30th, 2001, 04:42 PM
#12
PowerPoster
all 3 (4 counting parents as 2)
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Nov 30th, 2001, 04:49 PM
#13
Thread Starter
Hyperactive Member
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