worst place to ask this

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 01:43 PM

Hey everyone..[]wave[] im sitting here crying a bit..yeah i got the right..my girlfriend broke up with me because i told a lie to her..she lives in england and i in the netherlands..i need this girl really..i love her more then anything

im thinking about a way to make it up..i dont know how to..i just know i love her...

i dont know if anyone wants to listen or help or whatever..i just needed to lose this

**timeshifter** · Jan 11th, 2005, 01:48 PM

Handgun + Skull = instant solution to any problem!

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 01:56 PM

yeah thanks..i was thinking on that..but would a magnum.454 taurus raging bull be good too..? and would i feel any pain ?

**visualAd** · Jan 11th, 2005, 01:57 PM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

Hey everyone..[]wave[] im sitting here crying a bit..yeah i got the right..my girlfriend broke up with me because i told a lie to her..she lives in england and i in the netherlands..i need this girl really..i love her more then anything

im thinking about a way to make it up..i dont know how to..i just know i love her...

i dont know if anyone wants to listen or help or whatever..i just needed to lose this

What did you lie about?

The moral of this story is you shouldn't lie to your girl friend.

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 01:59 PM

Comming over to her

**wossname** · Jan 11th, 2005, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

would i feel any pain ?

Not afterwards, no.

You need to tell us about the lie you told her. If it was a whopper:
"I didn't sleep with your sister" then nobody will blame the girl for dumping you.

If it was a tiny white fib: "I am the king of Siam" then she is overreacting and you should ignore her for a while, let her know you can do without her.

DO NOT GROVEL! That is the ultimate way to get rid of her forever.

Just sidle up to some other pretty girl in a bar (not too pretty mind you) and make a bit of small talk. She'll get jealous and come back to you.

Its a dead-cert, never fails.

Signed
Wossname, VBF's agony aunt.

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 02:36 PM

well..it went like this:

She said..she needed someone closer 2 weeks ago
which i responded to: i cant be close soon,but ill try as hard as i can
then she said: i love you and stuff(and stuff is all the mushy stuff i said too)

and then not too long ago i told her i was comming today..i dont know why but i did..i guess this distance thing is making me go insane..

hope i explained the lie thing a bit..i just wish she would forgive me..

**visualAd** · Jan 11th, 2005, 02:54 PM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

.. and then not too long ago i told her i was comming today..

How long ago did you say that?

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 03:01 PM

...about..8 hours ago..

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 03:02 PM

Go to the Red light district and you will be healed again...

I

**visualAd** · Jan 11th, 2005, 03:03 PM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

...about..8 hours ago..

Go see her then!! - England isn't that far.

**Neo-dark** · Jan 11th, 2005, 03:16 PM

...its too late..forget it..

**MartinLiss** · Jan 11th, 2005, 03:50 PM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

...its too late..forget it..

It's never to late. Just call her (or email her if you think she'd hang up) and say something like.

"I'm sorry I was a jerk and lied to you and I promise I'll never do it again. You are very important to me and so I hope you can forgive me and give me a second chance."

**SteveCRM** · Jan 11th, 2005, 04:51 PM

i'd listen to marty. and don't dig yourself into a deeper whole by saying stuff like your car broke down, just don't go that road.

just explain it to her and then set up a meeting soon which you plan on actually showing up for. And bring flowers and such

**crptcblade** · Jan 11th, 2005, 05:15 PM

Find a terrorist and have him or her take you hostage. Perfect excuse. End of discussion. Marty, you may now close this thread.

**MasterBlaster** · Jan 11th, 2005, 05:23 PM

Originally Posted by SteveCRM

i'd listen to marty. and don't dig yourself into a deeper whole by saying stuff like your car broke down, just don't go that road.

He would definatly get busted. He has a 454 laying around

Dude, a 454 is a car engine manufactured by General Motors not a gun. You mean either a tarus 44 mag or a 45. mabe even possibly a 357 I've never seen a tarus 44 or 357 but I'm sure it's possibe one exists. The tarus 45 is badass, though, especially with a 19 round extended clip.

******************************
edit
After further review I stand corrected"

The "Raging Bull" is the name Taurus has given to their large-frame, double-action wheelgun capable of chambering the .454 Casull and .480

Now I know what I'm asking santa for next xmass. sweet!

**visualAd** · Jan 11th, 2005, 05:25 PM

Find and kidnap a terrorist and demand that the government fly your girl friend to Netherlands.

**Foxer** · Jan 11th, 2005, 06:34 PM

Hold Crptcblade hostage and demand the english govt fly her over for free.

What to do with Crpt afterwards? We could hold a poll I guess.

**Mike Hildner** · Jan 11th, 2005, 06:36 PM

mabe even possibly a 357 I've never seen a tarus 44 or 357

I've got a Taurus .357 magnum, it's a revolver. Jacketed 198 grain hollow point rounds. I've read it's the deadliest pistol round you can get, because it goes so fast, and oh yeah, hollow point.

You should see what happens when you take that to some watermelon or a five gallon jar of mustard. More fun than the time the pigs ate my little brother.

BTW, sorry about your lady, Neo-dark. If it would help you any, you can have my girlfriend. I know it would help me.

**System_Error** · Jan 11th, 2005, 06:42 PM

Well, if it were me, I would go after someone else. Since I'm a pimp, I would go after and get about six or seven girls. That way if one wants to leave, I have plenty left.

**MasterBlaster** · Jan 11th, 2005, 06:59 PM

Originally Posted by Mike Hildner

I've got a Taurus .357 magnum, it's a revolver. Jacketed 198 grain hollow point rounds. I've read it's the deadliest pistol round you can get, because it goes so fast, and oh yeah, hollow point.

You should see what happens when you take that to some watermelon or a five gallon jar of mustard. More fun than the time the pigs ate my little brother.

Sweet. I used to have the taurus 45 auto but traded it in on one of these with a pistol grip and folding stock. http://world.guns.ru/shotgun/sh05-e.htm
It shoots 12 ga rifled hollowpoints. Pretty fun in a pumpkin patch.

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:00 PM

I hate shotguns....so boring...

**Jacob Roman** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:00 PM

Man you ain't the only person with girl problems. I'm sure plenty of people here know my story. My girlfriend of three years broke up with me 2 days before Christmas cause she's gay, and has been cheating on me for 7 months with her best friend. Talk about harsh!!! She's been my fiancee for 2 years too.

**Foxer** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:03 PM

Your only chance Neo is to follow Marty's advise.

Come clean and gamble with everything you've got - what have you got to lose right? Probably not much.

Go for it - give it your best shot. Make a fool of yourself (not a jerk) in a funny, romantic, sensitive way and she'll either walk, which means you can sleep at night knowing it was not meant to be, or she'll propose to you and be on the next flight over.

**MartinLiss** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:05 PM

Originally Posted by SteveCRM

i'd listen to marty....

I'm thinking about starting a new Chit Chat subforum called "Advice for the Lovelorn" where I would answer all such questions from you youngsters.

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:06 PM

Hehe...I would probably have a post count higher then the sky in that forum....I think it could have kicked..."Ask Marty what you don't dare ask your mom about - forum"

hehehheheeh

**Foxer** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:07 PM

Marty,

Haven't you been married for - like - 150 years?

It certainly makes you qualified.

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:07 PM

Ohhh...and can I be a mod...

**MasterBlaster** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:16 PM

Originally Posted by NoteMe

I hate shotguns....so boring...

It's not really a shotgun. It has a rifled barrel like a pistol and shoots a single bullet instead of a bunch of pellets. It'll shread a beer can at 120 meters no problem. I use it for bear hunting in the really thick mountain laurel.

Sorry for the hijack. Good luck sorting things out with you Ol lady.
PS: I'll trade you a slightly used wife for that 454

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:22 PM

Originally Posted by MasterBlaster

It's not really a shotgun. It has a rifled barrel like a pistol and shoots a single bullet instead of a bunch of pellets. It'll shread a beer can at 120 meters no problem. I use it for bear hunting in the really thick mountain laurel.

Ohhh it is a reifle. Well that explains a lot. Still like two handed automat weapons better. If I made it to a SWAT group and had to be the one with a shot gun, I would have quit on the day...

...

Ohhh yeah....me to sorry for the hijack stuff. Hope you can fix it in some way. If there is someone that knows how painfull a long distance realationship is, then it is me.

**visualAd** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:25 PM

Originally Posted by NoteMe

Ohhh...and can I be a god...

You need to apply to the superhuman liason commission and wait out a six month cooling off period. I was successful and i was made the god of green nasal discharge.

Now all bogies bow to me

**NoteMe** · Jan 11th, 2005, 07:37 PM

Well, what about an angle then? That can't be too much to ask for....

**ice_531** · Jan 11th, 2005, 08:37 PM

Is it so smart to discuss guns with depression in a thread? There should also be a forum for "Thread Reviews" .... there should be a political process that has to be undergone before a post is finalized... if it meets all requirements and passes through the VBF senate and not veto by Marty...it is posted

Alternate Post:

Get Drunk. Have hookers in your car. Get arrested. Blame you being arrested for your not being able to meet up with her. Break up. Find out she was really a man. Become gay and follow him.

Alternate Alternate Post:

Talk it out with her and be honest. All things honest lead to success.

Please refer to my Signature when reading my post.
Thank You

**BodwadUK** · Jan 12th, 2005, 03:39 AM

If she wont talk on the phone and your serious you can go over now and knock on her door. Women love that stuff in films

**davebat** · Jan 12th, 2005, 06:39 AM

Originally Posted by Neo-dark

i dont know if anyone wants to listen or help or whatever..i just needed to lose this

Im in England, give me her address and ill pop round and sort things out with her.

**BodwadUK** · Jan 12th, 2005, 07:04 AM

You really are desperate if you are stabbing people in the back Dave

No just come over and see her face to face to show that you do care. Assuming you have some time and enough money should it go wrong and you need a room in a hotel

**MasterBlaster** · Jan 12th, 2005, 12:54 PM

Originally Posted by ice_531

Is it so smart to discuss guns with depression in a thread? There should also be a forum for "Thread Reviews" .... there should be a political process that has to be undergone before a post is finalized... if it meets all requirements and passes through the VBF senate and not veto by Marty...it is posted

Sure, it's absolutly the smartest thing you could possibly do. Any how, Marty does not have time for this. There are too many geeks here who can't satisfy their chicks. He's too busy trying to help those poor SOBs.

**timeshifter** · Jan 14th, 2005, 12:25 PM

Too bad most of them have already given up.. I think Marty's got plenty of time now... haha.. i said time... haha...

**Neo-dark** · Jan 24th, 2005, 04:16 PM

Sorry that i didnt respond in some time,im okay :-) she and i are okay..listened to marty..her response back was "damn right you where a jerk you *******,i love you" and thats it i guess,and yes i do have a magnum.454 laying around.owned by my dad at first but he gave it to me..(cant get ammo for it tho :-( ) hmm so my taurus ragin bull against your slightly used wife..? naw ill go for saz saz,Yay i included a pic of me and one of her,still a sea between us tho
im going to her at the 11th coz then my dad will take me :-) thanks for the help everyone(oh yes for the disbeliever of the magnum.454 here's a small pic included,i also have a link to a good tarus site but it only has instructions how to maintaine a gun)

**MartinLiss** · Jan 24th, 2005, 04:25 PM

Glad I was able help. In return you should name your firstborn after me

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