How do you know when a trumpet player is at your door?
The doorbell shrieks!
Printable View
How do you know when a trumpet player is at your door?
The doorbell shrieks!
Why can't a gorilla play trumpet?
He's too sensitive.
What do trumpet players use for birth control?
Their personalities.
Too true! (*parksie gets his trumpet out... ;)*)Quote:
Originally posted by barrk
How man trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because the world revloves around them!
What did little Johnny's mother tell him when he said "I want to be a trumpet player when I grow up?"
"But Johnny, you can't do both."
Quote:
LET Jesus be YOUR anchor!
So when Satan rocks your boat, THROW Jesus overboard!
What would a trumpet player do if he won a million dollars?
Continue to play gigs until the money ran out.
How many trumpet players does it take to change a lightbulb?
Five. One to handle the bulb and four to tell him how much better they could have done it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get away from the trumpet players.
How do you improve the aerodynamics of a trumpeter's car?
Take the Domino's Pizza sign off the roof.
What do you call a lead trumpet player with half a brain?
Gifted.
What's the first thing a trumpet player says at work?
"Would you like fries with that?"
How many trumpet players does it take to change a lightbulb?
Five. One to change the bulb and four to contemplate how Louie Armstrong would have done it.
I played the trumpet in orchestra all through school. My teacher used to bag on us constantly....I don't remember any more. I'll just have to switch to drummers now.
What's the best way to confuse a drummer?
Put a sheet of music in front of him.
What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians?
A drummer.
Why is it good that drummers have a half-ounce more brains than horses?
So they don't disgrace themselves in parades.
I basically have to because I'm the best in the school. Also, I'm the only trumpeter that bothers to turn up :(. However, I'm also pretty bad...which shows the average standard at my school :rolleyes:
I have played at some weddings and stuff, so got some handy cash for that :)
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They have a machine that does that now.
Quote:
There was a young lady of Natchez
Who chanced to be born with two snatches,
And she often said, "****!
Why, I'd give either tit
For a man with equipment that matches."
There was a young fellow named Locke
Who was born with a two-headed cock.
When he'd fondle the thing
It would rise up and sing
An antiphonal chorus by Bach.
But whether these two ever met
Has not been recorded as yet,
Still, it would be diverting
To see him inserting
His whang while it sang a duet.
How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?
The knock always speeds up.
I got a mandolin for Christmas from my husband...I'm pretty bad at it but I'm having fun.....Music is truly the second best thing on earth!
Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car?
Yeah, it took two hours to get the drummer out.
I heard. So what's the best thing on earth?Quote:
Originally posted by barrk
I got a mandolin for Christmas from my husband...I'm pretty bad at it but I'm having fun.....Music is truly the second best thing on earth!
Oh wait...I realised... ;)
hehehe!
12 pages to go!
Quote:
QOTD:
I get girls because of who I am... a rapist.
Quote:
happiness, n.:
Finding the owner of a lost bikini.
Quote:
Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.
-- Quentin Crisp
Quote:
The road to hell is paved with good intentions. And littered with
sloppy analysis!
Quote:
There was a young fellow of Kent
Whose ***** was so long that it bent,
So to save himself trouble
He put it in double,
And instead of coming he went.
We
Quote:
What do you give a man who has everything? Penicillin.
-- Jerry Lester
are
Quote:
All extremists should be taken out and shot.
going
Quote:
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
-- Milton Friedman
to
make
3000
yet!!!!!!!!!