Lisa: Dad, 10% of 200 million isn't 2000, it's ...
Doctor: I've never seen a man suffer four simultaneous heart attacks before!
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Lisa: Dad, 10% of 200 million isn't 2000, it's ...
Doctor: I've never seen a man suffer four simultaneous heart attacks before!
Wiggum : What is your fascination with my forbidden closet of mistery?
Wiggum: ...Now what do you say?
Ralph: Freeze you crazy mommy!
Burns: Smithers, there's a rocket in my pocket!
Dr. Hibbert's wife: Don't you usually laugh at everything?
Dr. Hibbert (seriously): Yes. Yes I do.
Burns: Ooh, that looks like a good island!
Smithers: That's Cuba, sir
Burns: Take her down Smithers!
Smithers: You're flying the plane sir
Burns: Excellent...
Homer: .. And this meat is so tasty!
Little Cuban Boy: Es carne de burro
I came for a collosal donut, and I'm gonna get a collosal donut....
Ralf: Mr. Simpson, the tar fumes are making me dizzy.
FBI Agent: Hello Mister Thompson. *tap* *tap* *tap*
Homer: I think he's talking to you.
Ralph: Can I touch your scar?
Homer: Sure.
Ralph: It's healing over my hand!
Homer: It knows you're afraid.
Moe: (furious) I'm even taking your favorite album out of the jukebox
Homer: (sad) It's raining men?
Teacher: Ralph, remember the time you thought you saw Snagglepuss?
Ralph: He was going to the bathroom.
Hey, that's not the wallet inspector...
Bart: Hey, where's Ralph?
Ralph: (hanging from a weather vane) I almost died.
Moe: Well I'm better than dirt! Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt, that stuff's loaded with nutrients. Ahh, I can't compete with that stuff.
911 Operator : We've already been there for an emergency sisterectomy, a case of severe butt-rot, and a leprechaun bite...how dumb do you think we are?
Lisa: So Mr. burns, i guess you've realized the folly of killing animals for clothing
Burns: Yes, i will never again wear the coat of a killed animal (talking under his breath) that can do an amusing trick!
Marge : Do you know why I said I would marry you?
Homer : Because I knocked you up?
Homercles cares not for beans
Uh-oh, I think he's trying to hypnotise me, and not in the good Las Vegas way.
Mayor: Citizens of Springfield, I hereby declare, What the h ell is that?!?
Homer: But tonight I'm drunk on love. And beer.
Kang or Kodos: Holy flirking shnit!
Dude, I sorta like fell on a bullet, and it like lodged itself into my gut?
Hey look a freezer-geezer!
Barney: Hi, I'm Barney, and I'm an alchoholic.
Triple A guy: Well, I feel for you pal, but this is triple a. You want double A.
Homer: My name is Homer, and I'd like to plan a trip to St. Louis.
Triple A guy: East St. Louis?
Homer: What other St. Louis is there?
On the Quicky-Mart Note:Quote:
Originally posted by crptcblade
Hey look a freezer-geezer!
Quote:
Apu: Thank you. If you live, come again.
Mr. Burns: I've got a monopoly going on. I own the water works, the electric company, and the hotel on Baltic Avenue!
Homer: Ovulate damn you, OVULATE!
Game: You are out of sperm...
Homer: Twenty dollars?! I wanted a peanut!
Homer's Brain:Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts!!
Homer: Explain how.
Homer's Brain:Money can be exchanged for goods and services!
Phone rings to Moe's bar
Bart: Hello?
Moe: Yes?
Bart: Is Mike Rotch there?
Moe: Hold on, I'll check.
Moe: Is there a Mike Rotch here? Has anybody seen Mike Rotch?
Background (bar) is filled with laughter
Moe: Why you...I'm gonna get you, you little...
Bart: Hahahaha!
:D:D:D
Marge: Would you like a tall frosty one homer?
Homer: (whimpering) Ohh....
Homer's stomach: Give in... Give in..
Homer's feet: These cotton-polyester blends are so comfortable!
Mmmm...erotic cakes...
Lenny : Homer, what's the matter?
Carl: Yeah, ain't ya never seen a naked chick ridin' a clam before?
Homer: I want everyone to know that Ned Flanders is my friend!!!
Lenny: What'd he say?
Carl: I dunno, somethin' about bein' gay.
Shut up brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip.
ralph: my knob taste funny
Computer: Press any key....
Homer: Where's the any-key?
Miss Hoover: Ralph are you eating paste again?
Ralph: Mmo Mfss Hoovrr
Bart: We have to go to that show.
Lisa: To get those tickets our parents would have to be part of Springfield's cultural elite.
Homer: Can you believe Flanders threw out a perfectly good toothbrush?
Lisa: Dad, I think he's an ivory dealer. His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I'm pretty sure that check is ivory.
Homer: Lisa, a guy who's got lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.
Homer: (to Marge) I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line, i'm out of order? no you're out of order, the whole freaking system is out of order! You want the truth? You want the truth?? You cant handle the truth, cuz when you put your hand in a pile of goo, that was your best friends face, you'll know what to do. Forget it Marge, its Chinatown!
Homer: (picking up leaves in pain) Ohhh, my back! That chiropractor didn't do anything for my back, it still hurts.
Bart: Did you do those exercises he gave you?
Homer: (sarcastically) Yeah right! I did them while you were studying!
Carl: That sounded like an explosion at the old Simpson place.
Chief: Forget it, that house is 2 blocks away.
Carl: Looks like there's beer comin' out of the chimney.
Chief: I am proceeding on foot, call in at code 8
Carl: We need pretzels, repeat pretzels.
Religious rallying type person 1: Christian Conscious awareness.
Homer: (pointing) This Bart, is a Crazy man.
Religious rallying type person 2: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
Homer: (sarcastically) Sure that'll work..
Movementarian: A new and better life awaits you on our distant planet Blisstonia.
Homer: (nods) Hum, makes sense.
Quote:
Originally posted by f¡lburt1
Post all your favorite simpsons' quotes here!
Quote:
Let's say I committed this crime ... Even if I did do this, it would have been because I loved her very much, right?"
- O.J.Simpson
:D :D :D :D :D :D
Wiggum: What's that, statue? You want me to shoot everybody? (crowd gasps in horror) No, I'm just screwing with you. It's a miracle.
Ralph time!
I have a whole MP3 of just Ralph sayings.Quote:
My neck hurts and my ear hurts. I have two owies.
Me fail English? That's unpossible!
What's a battle?
saxamaphone and purplemonkeydishwasher
or this one:
Skinner:Ralph i would like you to meet superin. chalmers.
Ralph: Hello supernintendo chalmers
:D