Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus"?
Well, here's a prime example offered by an English professor at Southern Methodist University,
English 44A, SMU, Creative Writing.
In-class Assignment for Wednesday: "Today we will experiment with a new
form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair
off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will
then write the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the
first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the story. The first person
will then add a third paragraph, and so on back and forth. Remember to
re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. The
story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached."
"The following was actually turned in by two of my English students:
Rebecca - last name deleted, and Gary - last name deleted."
-----------------------------------------------------------
STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca)
At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The
chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now
reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he
liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind
off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him
too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the
question.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron
now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than
the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had
spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17,"
he said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No
sign of... ' A bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a
hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him
flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.
---------------------------------------------------------
He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt
one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless
hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes
Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her
newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She
stared out the window, dreaming of her youth-when the days had passed
unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to distract her
from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her.
"Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered
wistfully.
---------------------------------------------------------
Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of
its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who pushed
the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through Congress had left Earth
a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to
destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty
the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower
to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly
initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine
headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized Laurie and 85 million
other Americans. The President slammed his fist on the conference table. "We
can't allow this! I'm going to veto that treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the
sky!"
----------------------------------------------------------
This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My
writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic, semi-literate adolescent.
----------------------------------------------------------
Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at
writing are the literary equivalent of Valium.
----------------------------------------------------------
*******.
----------------------------------------------------------
*****.
Is the universe's mass static?
Quote:
Originally posted by DerFarm
If you can define, in ANY terms, that the soul has mass,
then it follows that there could be a theoretical limit to
the number of souls the created universe can hold. That
is, the sum total of mass in the universe.
I thought the universe was constantly expanding?
The solution to some questions...
You want to know if souls have mass? Or if dogs have souls? Well, try this:
Find a person who is moments from death and determine their mass. Then measure their mass once more after they die. The difference will be the mass of their soul.
Do the same with a dog or a tree. If there's a difference, then they have a soul!
Now I ask you this: If a soul has mass, then what determines it's size?
a) They're all the same
b) The size of the body they inhabited
c) The "closeness to God" of the owner
d) Other...
