New Rule At Work

The leisure centre I work for have just invested in new computers. I was greeted at work today with a memo stating the following:

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To All Receptionists,

The reception computers have now been replaced, they will still use the Scuba system, so no additional training will be required. Due to past unscrupilous activities by certain members of staff, the computers must only be used for Scuba. Receptionists are not permitted to close Scuba, shut down or start the computers or use the computer for anything other than its intended use.

Part receptionists are no longer permitted to use the card printer. A full time, fully trained member of staff whose responsibility it is to print membership cards will be on the premisies at all times. In the event that this is not the case - you must inform customers that their card cannot be printed.

Any member of staff found to be in breach of these rules will be dicaplined and may lose their reception a hours.

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A complete joke :D - It was only a few weeks back that I saved the duty managers ass by removing a FREE Porn Dialer from his computer. I already got a bullocking from todays duty manager becuase I moved the keyboard six inches to the left of its originaly poistion, due to the fact it was hurting my arms while typing. :rolleyes:

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Any member of staff found to be in breach of these rules will be dicaplined and may lose their reception a hours.

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If the changed that to this:

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Any member of staff found to be in breach of these rules will be decapitated and may lose their reception a hours.

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They'd probably get better results.

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Posted by visualAd
I already got a bullocking from todays duty manager becuase I moved the keyboard six inches to the left of its originaly poistion, due to the fact it was hurting my arms while typing. :rolleyes:

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:lol:

I always see things like:

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Receptionists are not permitted to close Scuba, shut down or start the computers or use the computer for anything other than its intended use.

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...as an open invitation to try to break in and use it for things 'other than its intended use'.

They might as well put up a sign saying "DO NOT PUSH THIS BIG RED BUTTON".

Are your reception computer running WinXP Home edition by any chance? If so then you have free reign of the system. XP Home rules :D

I recently recommended to our bosses that they only buy new PC's if they have XP Home pre-installed. w00t!

They are professional edition - and password protected. With a blank password :D

Sue the leisure center bosses for damaging your muscles due to unconfortable positioning. Check the whole office complies with standards and make them spend loads of money. That will shut them up. Oh and take a break every 90 minutes because you are using a computer :D

Wow password protection is so useful when its blank. I give it 2 seconds before they are hacked and lose all their customers details.

Why is an admin system names after a diving sport :lol:

The first things you do when gaining access to the system is cover your tracks. Then you head straight to the users dialogs and disconnect and revoke all admin rights for the sysadmins. Then you choose someone you don't like very much and give him full admin privelidges, make a note of his password and leave an anonymous note on his desk telling him what it is. Don't tell him he's got admin rights.

Then just report that you heard him bragging to his hacker mates on the phone that he's pwnd the work LAN. Goodbye pal, the IT bods will be after his hide faster than CrptcBlade trying to kill and skin someone. w00t!

The resume control of the network under an assumed name and keep schtum.

S0c1al eng1n33rin9 pwns joo

I often find that our engineers think of a clever password like "Engineer" but dress it up like:

"_Engineer_"

Noobies :rolleyes:

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Originally posted by wossname
The first things you do when gaining access to the system is cover your tracks. Then you head straight to the users dialogs and disconnect and revoke all admin rights for the sysadmins. Then you choose someone you don't like very much and give him full admin privelidges, make a note of his password and leave an anonymous note on his desk telling him what it is. Don't tell him he's got admin rights.

Then just report that you heard him bragging to his hacker mates on the phone that he's pwnd the work LAN. Goodbye pal, the IT bods will be after his hide faster than CrptcBlade trying to kill and skin someone. w00t!

The resume control of the network under an assumed name and keep schtum.

S0c1al eng1n33rin9 pwns joo

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:lol:

'dicaplined' ... oo err, like the sound of that :thumb:

Naughty cat get back to your proper job and leave my PC alone :mad: