NO OFFENCE INTENDED
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English
language today is the word '****'. It is the one magical word which, just
by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, '****' falls into many grammatical categories.
It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John ****ed Mary) and
intransitive (Mary was ****ed by John).
It can be an action verb (John really gives a ****), a passive verb
(Mary really doesn't give a ****), an adverb (Mary is ****ing
interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific ****).
It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is ****ing beautiful) or an
interjection (****! I'm late for my date with Mary).
It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, **** she's also
stupid).
As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of
the word '****'. Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word
can be used to describe many situations...
Greetings "How the **** are ya?"
Fraud "I got ****ed by the car dealer."
Resignation "Oh, **** it!"
Trouble "I guess I'm ****ed now."
Aggression "**** YOU!"
Disgust "**** me."
Confusion "What the ****.......?"
Difficulty "I don't understand this ****ing business!"
Despair "****ed again..."
Pleasure "I couldn't be ****ing happier."
Displeasure "What the **** is going on here?"
Lost "Where the **** are we."
Disbelief "UN****ING BELIEVABLE!"
Retaliation "Up your ****ing ass!"
Denial "I didn't ****ing do it."
Perplexity "I know **** all about it."
Apathy "Who really gives a ****, anyhow?"
Greetings "How the **** are ya?"
Suspicion "Who the **** are you?"
Panic "Let's get the **** out of here."
Directions "**** off."
Disbelief "How the **** did you do that?"
It can be used in an anatomical description- "He's a ****ing *******."
It can be used to tell time- "It's five ****ing thirty."
It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this ****ing job?"
It can be maternal- "Mother ****er."
It can be political- "**** Al Gore!"
It has also been used by many notable people throughout history...
"What the **** was that?"
- Mayor of Hiroshima
"Where the **** is all this water coming from?"
- Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a real ****ing gun."
- John Lennon
"Who's gonna ****ing find out?"
- Richard Nixon
"Heads are going to ****ing roll."
- Anne Boleyn
"Let the ****ing woman drive."
- Commander of Space Shuttle
"What ****ing map?"
- "Challenger," Mark Thatcher
"Any ****ing idiot could understand that."
- Albert Einstein
"It does so ****ing look like her!"
- Picasso
"How the **** did you work that out?"
- Pythagoras
"You want what on the ****ing ceiling?"
- Michaelangelo
"**** a duck."
- Walt Disney
"Why?- Because its ****ing there!"
- Edmund Hilary
"I don't suppose its gonna ****ing rain?"
- Joan of Arc
"Scattered ****ing showers my ass."
- Noah
"I need this parade like I need a ****ing hole in my head."
- John F. Kennedy
