Painfull but True ???

[venerable bede]

I recieved this painfull email yesterday:

You may want to hold yourself while you read some of these!

Bizarre 'Sex Accidents' Suffered by Blokes...

A man turned up at a hospital wearing an overcoat, and with blood dripping
down his leg. When he removed the coat, the doctor saw he had a geranium
inserted in his pen*s. The man had got the flower in without any
difficulty, but when he tried to remove it, the hairs on the stem of the
flower had dug into the urethra and ripped it to shreds.
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A policeman in Staffordshire returned home from a night shift to his wife
preparing breakfast. For some unknown reason, he wrapped a slice of bread
around his pen*s, at which point the dog leapt up and took a bite out of
it. The man needed cosmetic surgery to restore the damage.
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A 34-year old New Yorker injected a cocaine solution into his pen*s to
heighten his sexual pleasure. After enjoying intercourse with his
girlfriend on not one but two occasions, he noticed that his erection was
still at its full glory. Having struggled to sleep through the night he
woke up to find his boner still standing proud, but due to him worrying
about the police finding out about his possession, and indeed the use of an
illegal substance, he decided against visiting his doctor. However after
three days of enduring headaches and nausea, caused by the constant trouser
swelling, he went to the hospital in search of help. He was admitted
immediately and referred to a specialist who diagnosed lack of oxygen to
vital bloodstream's in his body, as the cause of his sickness. He was given
numerous drugs and antibiotics to combat the swelling, but shortly
afterwards developed blood clots in various parts of his body with gangrene
setting in. As a result he lost both legs, nine fingers and his pen*s.
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You may want to grit your teeth before you read this.
This is really gruesome....When a mate was studying in Ireland, he took up
rugby. As his first season wore on, the lads and him were eventually
scheduled to play a team which had a reputation for violent play.
Considering that they weren't the most talented outfit to have ever taken
the field, they decided to accept the challenge with a "do or die"
attitude, hoping things would eventually swing their way. They didn't, and
to make matters worse their star player dislocated his hip after a
particularly ferocious tackle. He was clearly in a lot of pain, so they all
stood back to allow the medic to, in one swift movement, slot the hip back
into its socket. Then Alan began a long blood curdling scream. To their
horror, they realised that one of his testicles had also been jammed into
the socket and was now firmly held in the place by the hip. Incidentally,
he also managed to rip a vocal chord with his screaming.

[venerable bede]

SOMEONE PLEASE MOVE THIS.

I am a fool !

[Shaggy Hiker]

It covered the US and Ireland, so it is sort of world events

[wossname]

Originally posted by venerable bede

You may want to hold yourself while you read some of these!

I was holding myself already.

[demotivater]

OMG!!

That last one makes me want to cry.

[wossname]

Despite the fact that it is probably impossible. There are dense layers of tissue surrounding the pelvic socket, a bollock is going to find it difficult to find its way through it without becoming completely detatched (having to travel 6-7 inches) and splattered. Unlikely.

It would sting a bit though.

[davebat]

why spoil a good story with the truth?

[wossname]

Sorry. Maybe it was someone else's bollock?

[venerable bede]

LOL

[nishantp]

I hope that dude didnt plan on starting a family...

[mudfish]

When I was in High School I heard this report on the radio!

“2 people killed in a one car accident, the car ran off the road and hit a tree. The driver died from bleeding in the abdominal section. The passenger died about 50 feet from the car, she choke to death from something lodge in her throat!”

[wossname]

Originally posted by mudfish
bleeding in the abdominal section

Is that like business class?

[BodwadUK]

the pain