Monkey MONKEY!!!!

[Arbiter]

Hello VB-World!

How's everyone heen - I've missed you all!

Not been on the site for ages and when I do get on I find that some Southern Fairy has now got a contract in Manchester!!!

Well, I've had a quick squizz through all the threads I've missed whilst I've been away and I see the hunt for Batman is still on.

Do people still care?

Anyone want to give me a summary of events I've missed?

Thanks greatly!

[Arbiter]

Remarkable!

That must have been fun - did you manage it?

[SteveCRM]

It's only been in the last week or two that the batman hunt started again

[Arbiter]

Methinks there is a lot of straaaange people around here!

[SteveCRM]

:)

[parksie]

We'll take that as a compliment ;)

[Arbiter]

It was intended as such...

Interesting experiment - to find out just how strange people are around here all I have to say is...

"Parksie walks into a bar and..."

[Benjamin]

*and falls on arbiter*
*arbiter gets pissed and throws parksie at steve, but accidently hits dennis*
*dennis grabs steve and throws him at parksie, but misses, and hits honeybee*
*honeybee foresees this object and raises his stinger..*

continued next week :D

[parksie]

*parksie gets his eightballs out*

Hehehehehe.

[Benjamin]

parksie,
do you know what these mean?

BOHICA
SNAFU


I know, but I am not telling you, unless you give up :)...(you should know, if you know what FUBAR is)

[Ianpbaker]

arbiter is quitley typing away on his keyboard and sudenly feels like he's being watched, he turn's round just in time to see a large wet haddock flying towards his face and a face that is grinning madly at him as it smacks him right round the chops.

How goes it arbiter, I was wondering when you would make an appearance (thought I scared you off). Machester's fine apart from it's full of northerner's.

Had nice things to say about Britian & USA. You must the huge swearing threads....bad boy Dennis....and a few new members....

Oh and of course

Iain admitted he was a southern sherry drinker. :rolleyes:

Actually l have to get out of saying that.

[Ianpbaker]

jethro, I ansolutley hate sherry, and as for fostersm it's like drinking rat's piss, so leave myself an iain out of this ;)

Originally posted by Ianpbaker
jethro, I ansolutley hate sherry, and as for fostersm it's like drinking rat's piss, so leave myself an iain out of this ;)

Ok fair enough you don't like sherry contrary to public opinion, so will not bring it up again...no pun intended. Rest in the knowledge of this you old swan lite drinker you.:)

[Ianpbaker]

swan lite, at least I don't have half a pint of kaliber shandy (heavy on the lemonade) and fall over drunk ;)

[Arbiter]

Snarling, Arbiter extracts the haddock from his nostrils and places it on the ground.

Then, he sits back and grins quietly to himself, secure in the knowledge that he's poisoned the entire supply of Sherry in the north west and the only person likely to be drinking it is....

IanPBaker.

(Awight pal, you need to let me know where in MCR you are so you can buy me that pint you owe me!!)

Arbiter raises his eyebrow at the 'eightballs' Parksie has just got out...

Am I correct in assuming that Benjamin is DennisWren?

If so, a whole can of whoop ass is going to be opened merely to honour his presence!

[barrk]

Yes Benjamin and Dennis are one and the same...and both of them are smart-asses...imagine that!!!!!!

[JPRoy392]

SNAFU - Situtation Normal, All *****@d up.

What is the other one, BOHICA?

[Benjamin]

Bend Over, Here It Comes Again

[barrk]

Dennis/Benjamin...you've been awfully quiet lately. What's up?

[Benjamin]

I've been a little busy with schoolwork lately. :(

[barrk]

Do you get off for the holidays soon?

[Benjamin]

on the 21st

[barrk]

Do you only get the one week then? Kids around here get off on the 18th...at least mine do.

Have I done something to tick everyone off around here? Nobody seems to be talking...what's up?

[HarryW]

I'm finished tomorrow, then I'm off until about... The 20th? Something like that. I have been here at uni for about 15 weeks straight though, so it's not like we have half term or anything. Exams are over now (hoorah) and I reckon they went alright. I think probably a 2:1 or a first, depending on my luck. I'm absolutely knackered, been up by 5:30 am every day since Saturday, and been doing exams too. Off to bed soon I think *Yawn*

[barrk]

Enjoy your time off. Congrats on your exams. Get some sleep!

[HarryW]

Thaknyou, thankyou, and okay :)

Must be the end of year coming up.

Harry has finished his home economics exams. Hope the cake turned out ok big fella.

Dennis is off to burn down the nearest forest he can lay hands on.

Arbiter already has his case of Newcastle cooling in the fridge.

Downunder gearing up for the third test against the Windies, hopefully we get to bat more than once this time.

Katie is organising trips to the zoo, movies, and gun shows for her little ones.

[HarryW]

I wish it had been home ec, it would have been about a million times more interesting. Today was Information Modelling. Personally I don't actually care how you can make a database system using CODASYL or IMS.

[barrk]

No Jethro...NEVER gun shows. My little ones are 14,16 and 18...the time for me to be organizing things for them are long gone...now they tell me where to go...literally, sometimes. Actually, they are pretty respectfull of me for some reason. I'm pretty lucky... or maybe it's the baseball bat I keep in the corner...not sure which

[Edited by barrk on 12-13-2000 at 04:13 PM]

HarryW At least its over dude. Go out and have a few pints to celebrate. We always did after exams, and for the really boring ones a few before hand as well.

Katie Hmmm....maybe you could get them to mow the lawns, cook dinner or whatever.

[Benjamin]

Originally posted by barrk
No Jethro...NEVER gun shows

whats wrong with gunshows? :confused:

[barrk]

Everything, Dennis! I think we've had this discussion before. I don't feel that easy access to any weapon of choice is a good idea...let alone glamorizing it with "Gun Shows".

[Benjamin]

but guns are only dangerous if you let them be...

my dad has a locked cabinet with all 200 of our guns in it.. and I am not aloud to have them out(look at them) unless he or my mom is around...

and the ammo is kept in the basement, I don't know where in the basement, but somewhere...

and the guns are never loaded in the house...

the worst injury I have had in my 4 years of experience, is when I was cleaning a M1-Garand, and the bolt wasn't locked all the way back, and it smashed my thumb sideways.. :eek:

but that kind of injury could have just as easily happened if I was hammering a nail, or closing a car door....

[barrk]

I'm glad to hear that at least your parents are responsible enough to take precautions...a lot of people aren't though.

[Arbiter]

Hey guys,

Seeing as I've got a crate of Newky Brown in the fridge you're all welcome to take one.

Barrk,

If you're organising a trip to the zoo, count me in - I ain't been to the zoo since I was a kid!

Dennis,

I'm sure you'll grow out of your fascination of guns. If you don't you'll either be in the special forces, a precision engineer or a psycho.

And, let's face it. Anyone who considers using Steve or Parksie as a weapon is hardly SAS material and you don't appear to have the patience to be a precision engineer, which leaves..... oh dear.

[barrk]

Arbiter...you're welcome to come to the zoo. Unfortunately, it's at my house..and the animals are all teenagers.

Katie

[Benjamin]

hey!!
don't insult steve and parksie.. they are really good weapons.. :rolleyes:

and, why would I want to be in the special forces? same with being a precision engineer, I want to be a programmer... duh...
and I will never outgrow my fascination with guns.. I have loved them since I could walk, and I always will...

[barrk]

Dennis...do you admit to being a psycho..and an armed one too boot?? Now you're really scaring me.

[Edited by barrk on 12-13-2000 at 05:39 PM]

[Benjamin]

I am not a psycho.. and I never said I was.....

[parksie]

Hmm...so I make a good weapon?

Hehehehehe.

BJ (that looks so dodgy!) - So you didn't have a .44 to chew on when you were teething? (aww...sweet)

[barrk]

Just teasing Dennis. You seem like a really together kid!

[Benjamin]

:)

Originally posted by barrk
Everything, Dennis! I think we've had this discussion before. I don't feel that easy access to any weapon of choice is a good idea...let alone glamorizing it with "Gun Shows".

"It's not guns that kill people, it's the idiots holding them".

Dennis

Your parents sound responsible. The problem being those people who aren't. Therefore countries pass gun laws to protect citizens from the unresponsible minority. Sort of "a few spoiling it for the rest of us".

Besides there's a Freudian concept about guns and ***** length. :rolleyes:

[Ianpbaker]

Arbiter - I'm working in the riverside complex on bridge street (those big white buildings just over the brisge) and I'm staying in a B&B in heywood street off cheetam hill road. If you mail me, i'll reply back with my mobile, as i'm not going to post it on here

Ian

[HarryW]

Aww, and I was going to put up posters all over uni with your mobile number and dodgy messages :rolleyes: The last guy got some interesting calls hehe :D

[Ianpbaker]

I wouldn't expect anything less from you harry

[HarryW]

"What? I don't have any goats, and if I did I wouldn't let you borrow one"

[Ianpbaker]

?

[HarryW]

That was an extract from a telephone conversation held by 'the last guy'.

[Ianpbaker]

ahh, I see. we set up one of those call card's for telephone boxes. It had descriptions of what juicy lucy's services was and one of our mates mobile number. Good fun had by all

[Arbiter]

Ian,

I've sent you a mail. I'm not in work now though so won't be able to receive a reply 'til tomorrow morning.

My number's on there. If I start to get 'phone calls from people requesting goats or trying to arrange welly flinging contests I'll come looking for you.....

[Ianpbaker]

Don't worry mate, i'm wouldn't do that to you





























yet

I'll reply back with my number, can't make tommorow night as I drive back home on friday's, but I can make any night apart from friday next week.

[Arbiter]

No Problem...

[Ianpbaker]

where about's in manchester is centrica

[Ianpbaker]

GGGGGGGRRRRRRRR

Have you seen what you've done arbiter. In every single thread, everyone is taking piss out of me and saying it's all to do with the sherry. you bastard ;)

Originally posted by HarryW
"What? I don't have any goats, and if I did I wouldn't let you borrow one"

Don't loan Iain one, it might drink all his sherry.:)

[parksie]

Nah...he's finished it all himself ;)

[Arbiter]

Sherry drinking Southern fairies!!!!

Ian,

Of course everyone's taking the p*ss out of you, that's what Southerners are there for!!!!!

HA HA HA!!!

So what kind of Sherry do you prefer? My gut's telling me it's Harveys Bristol Cream...

Oh, and it's the British Gas plant on Gould St. (Centrica own British Gas don'tcha know...)

Everyone else,

I think we now know what to get Ian for Christmas...

[Benjamin]

so, what are we going to get him?
Sherry, or a goat?

[Arbiter]

An alocoholic sherry jelly goat?

[Sophtware]

Dennis + 30 cal <= a nut ;) j/k

Originally posted by Benjamin
so, what are we going to get him?
Sherry, or a goat?


Have it on good authority that he caused major mayhem in the middle of London after numerous cans of beer and bottle of white wine.

However l have no need to know the really sordid details of what he does with goats. Have passed his description onto the RSPCA and am researching English laws regarding this sort of thing.

Lets face it Ian gives a whole new meaning to the term Animal Husbandry.

[Ianpbaker]

An alocoholic sherry jelly goat, My mouth is watering at the thought.